


Reasons

by I_O_U_a_Tardis



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: 221B Baker Street, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Beards (Relationships), Closeted Character, Complete, Drug Use, F/M, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Johnlock - Freeform, Love Confessions, M/M, Secret Relationship, Unilock, collegelock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:20:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 35,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24988192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_O_U_a_Tardis/pseuds/I_O_U_a_Tardis
Summary: John Watson's first day of Uni starts off rather strangely when he is suddenly forced to switch rooms and meets the strange and mysterious Sherlock Holmes.  No matter how hard John tries he just cannot get a good read on his new roommate, even though Sherlock was able to figure everything about John's life out in a matter of seconds. The more time they spend together the more John wonders, will they every really be friends, could they possibly be more than that one day?  Or will a secret of Sherlocks destroy any chance of a future for them?CompletedThe characters in the book are property of BBC. I do not own any of these characters. No copyright infringement is intended.
Relationships: Mary Morstan & John Watson, Mary Morstan/John Watson, Sherlock Holmes & John Watson, Sherlock Holmes & Molly Hooper, Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, Sherlock Holmes/Molly Hooper
Comments: 6
Kudos: 6





	Reasons

### Chapter One: The Dormmate

###  I hugged my mother and sister goodbye at the car, and grabbed my luggage. I was finally here, after four dreadful years of high school, being tormented for being bisexual, I was finally at university. I had been waiting for this day all summer, I couldn't wait to get my collegiate experience started, I wanted to do everything! I was no longer the weird poor kid at my school, I was just John Watson. At Baskerville University, no one knew me yet, so I could be whomever I wanted to be. I began walking toward the table in front of my residential hall, Baker, to receive my dorm number. "Hi, I'm John Watson." I smiled to the young women sitting at the table. "Hello John, looks like your in room 38, second level, in B wing." She handed me my keys and I headed into the building and up to the second floor. I walked down the hallway scanning the black doors for my number, 213B, 221B, 235B, at the end of the hallway I finally found my room. I slide the key in and unlocked the door. "Oh hey!" said a surprised face, my dorm mate was sitting on the bed nearer the window "I'm Lastrade, Greg Lastrade." "John Watson" I said putting my suitcases down. \--- After about an hour of searching for my textbooks in the campus store, I returned to my dorm to see Lastrade talking to someone in outside our door. He was a tall, skinny boy who looked about our age, maybe a few years younger. I could tell even from a distance that he has handsome. "Sherlock I'm already unpacked I am not switching rooms" "Hello" I said butting into the conversation and trying to squeeze past Lastrade and the hot stranger, "Sorry I'm just trying to get into the room." "Are you Lastrade's dorm mate?" The boy asked in a deep voice "Um ya, John Watson, pleased to meet you." "Sherlock Holmes, any chance you haven't unpacked yet" "Sorry what?" "My current dorm mate is insufferable, Lastrade and I have both already unpacked so there is no logic in either of us switching rooms." "Sorry still not quite following." I said feeling stupid. "I'm asking if you would be willing to trade rooms with my dorm mate." "Is that even allowed?" "Of course it is. Yes or no?" "Yes I suppose." A grin spread across Sherlock's face and he walked away. Lastrade turned to me, "Thanks John, there's nothing worse then a pissy Sherlock. I'll help you move your stuff." "So you know him them?" I asked Greg as we walked back into 238B. "We went to high school together, he's a tad different and his family is super uptight, probably because they come from money, but I like to think that we're friends." From down the hall I heard Sherlock shout "Get out Anderson, your moving!" And then saw an open suitcase get tossed into the hall. \--- I started unpacking as soon as I got into 221B, so that if asked I wouldn't have to switch dorms again. Sherlock was lying on his bed, the one closest to the door, with hands under his head and his legs crossed. I followed my eyes up his insanely long legs, his dress pants perfectly tailored to him. There was a visible bulge in his pelvic area, and my eyes lingered for a few moments to long before continuing upward. He was wearing a tight dark purple shirt, with the top buttons undone just enough to see his sculpted chest. His face was just as sexy as the rest of him, his cheekbones sharp and his hair a hot mess of black curls. I finally forced myself to stop staring, afraid that he might notice. "So what's your major?" I heard him say in a smooth deep voice, a few minutes later. "Pre-med, yours?" "Forensic science." "That's cool maybe we will have some classes together then." "Perhaps." That was all we spoke for the rest of the night. \--- Classes didn't start for another 2 days, so I decided to take a look around the campus. It wasn't too big but it was nice. There was a pool, a full workout room, two dining halls and a full theatre. After a few hours wandering about I returned to the dorm, to find Sherlock in the same spot he had been in since last night. "Are you okay Sherlock?" His eyes opened and his brows furrowed, "Of course why wouldn't I be?" "Well you haven't moved in 12 hours." "I've been thinking." "What could you have spent 12 hours straight thinking about?" "Everything." "Okay then." I said and strolled over to my bed. "So you want to be an army doctor." Sherlock stated rather than asked. "Ya, how'd you know?" "I didn't know, I observed. For starts you told me your pre-med, so doctor. You have an old army hat with your things, probably your father's, but you brought it with you to uni, so sentimental value. Maybe he died fighting. Also you're very fit, not a hard leap to army doctor." "You observed all that, well sitting with your hands under your chin?" "Not just that. I know practically everything about you now." "Oh really? That's a bit strange but what do you think you know?" "Your parents were still married when your father died, but your only sister is having some problems with alcohol, so not a perfect family. Your mother supports your sexuality but is still somewhat uncomfortable with it, by your sexuality, I of course mean the fact that your gay. You used to play football but you tore a ligament in your ankle, causing you to walk with a slight limp. Although your ankle is perfectly fine now, it's all in your head. For someone who wants to be a doctor, you should really notice things like that. Finally you think I'm quite attractive, your not wrong and I'm flattered but I'm straight and have a girlfriend." "What, how,um....that was bloody amazing." Sherlock shot upright and looked at me, puzzled. "Really? That's not what people usually say." "What do they usually say?" "Piss off." We both broke out into laughter, after we gained back some control, I turned to Sherlock. "Well you know an unsettling amount about me, tell me about yourself." "Nothing to tell." "Obviously that's not true." "Two parents, one brother, a girlfriend, and I want to be a detective. That's all." "Oh you want to work for Scotland Yard." "No! There all idiots! I want to be a consulting detective." "Never heard of it." "That's because I made it up, I'll take the cases the police are to thick to solve." "You can't just make up a job, Sherlock." "Why not?" "Because you can't." "That doesn't seem like a good enough reason to me." "I suppose not." I chuckled to myself as Sherlock returned to his 'thinking' position. \--- After Sherlock decided he was done thinking, we spent the rest of the day together, just walking around campus. Sherlock would deduce things about people and we would chuckle to ourselves. I would tell Sherlock he was being mean or crossing a line when he would talk to people and he would just roll his eyes and continue on. His eyes, I could stare into them forever and just be blissfully lost, swimming in the multicolored galaxy that they were. They let me know so much about him, even though I couldn't deduce. His eyes told me that he was soft and gentle on the inside even though he presented as a sharp, cruel, cold person. Mostly they told me he was in pain, the kind of pain that destroys you slowly, from the inside out, and all I wanted to do was make it go away. Although we had only known each other for a two days, we already had a strong connection, I felt like I had know him all my life, almost as if our friendship was destined to be. Around 6 o'clock we went back to the dorm, Sherlock left for a while on his own and I decided to take a shower. \--- I had just gotten out of the shower and was getting dressed when I heard the door of the dorm slam shut and Sherlock shout "If you come in here I will re-arrange your face!" I finished zipping up my jeans and walked towards my dorm mate. "Sherlock what the hell is going on?" The door opened and another boy strolled in, he looked several years older then us, possibly in graduate school. "Sherlock you better get used to the idea, they have the entire thing planned out to happen over winter break." "I don't care! I am not doing it!" "You don't get a say." "If I don't get a say in this then what the hell do I get a say in?" "Well I suppose when they die, you will get a greater voice." "Well let's pray that day comes before break! Because this is not happening!" "Oh brother mine, haven't you learned yet?" "Get out Mycroft!" I stood there watching the tension grow along with the silence between the two. I was assuming that they were brother's considering the boy's comment, but that only made things more awkward. Finally Mycroft left and Sherlock plopped down on his bed. I was still standing shirtless in the middle of the room, so I threw on my jumper and sat on my bed. After a few minutes I cleared my throat "Sherlock? What just happened?" "Nothing John." he mumbled into his pillow. "Well I don't think that was nothing and I think I deserve an explanation considering it happened in my dorm." "Our dorm." "What was that?" "Nothing." "Was that your brother?" "Unfortunately." "You don't like him then?" Sherlock flipped around on his side and glared at me "Obviously not! Now do you have anymore questions concerning things that are none of your business, or can I get some peace and quiet!?" Sherlock spat his words with a fiery breath. "Sorry." I said under my breath before putting in my headphones and laying down. \--- The next morning I was eating breakfast in one of the dining halls, not many people were awake this early in the morning since classes hadn't started yet, so I was sitting alone. That is until Sherlock walked over and sat down. "Um hi?" "Hello John. What are your plans for today?" "I don't have any yet." "Perfect. I found something I think we should check out." "Why?" "Because it's interesting." "No, I meant why do you want me to come?" "Well I don't want to go alone and you're the only tolerable person I've met so far." "What about Greg?" "Who?" "Greg Lastrade." "Oh! I would hardly say Lastrade is tolerable. If anything I think I would say occasionally bearable." "Ok then." "Let's go!" Sherlock said jumping out of his seat. "What? No!" "Why not?" "You haven't told me where we are going or said anything about last night." "Last night I had a fight with my brother about something my parents want me to do. It is regretful that you witnessed it but it's in the past so I would suggest getting over it." "Are you serious?" "Always, lets go." Sherlock began walking out. Reluctantly I shoved the rest of my breakfast in my mouth an hurried after him. \--- "Sherlock?" "Yes, John?" "What is so fascinating about this place?" I looked around to see nothing but trees surrounding us. Sherlock had led us through a maze of weeds, bugs and streams into the middle of the woods. We were standing in a small clearing, not even large enough for two tents. "The trees just stop. There isn't even the tiniest piece of foliage in this area." "Ya, it's a clearing, there not that rare." "But no one knows about it John! It's just ours, no one can tell us what to do or how to live in here." "So what are exactly are we supposed to do here." I said plopping down on the dirt, Sherlock copied me. "Like I said, we can do whatever we want! No one can make us do things we don't want to do!" "Does that happen to you a lot Sherlock? People telling you what to do?" "Let's just say my family is very controlling." "How so?" "Why do you care?" Sherlock snapped. "Because we're friends." I said ignoring his attitude. A small smile appeared on his face as he continued. "My family is very prestigious, and has an unyielding set of ideas of how my brother and I should behave. Every aspect of our life is controlled by our parents, they had my entire life planned out since before I was born." "Is that why your brother goes to this school as well, did they pick it for you two?" "Precisely. That is what the argument last night was about, my parents decided something for me and Mycroft was their messenger." "What do they want?" "Something unspeakable, but I can't disobey them." "Why? What would happen?" "I would have to do it anyway, my opinion doesn't matter to them in the slightest. "I'm so sorry Sherlock, that's horrible." "Yes it is." Sherlock sighed heavily and collapsed his head into my lap. I was a bit taken aback by this but I let it slide. He changed the subject and started rambling on about some murder that was on the news, but I wasn't listening. I was lost in his eyes again, scanning his body up and down, using all my self control not to play with his curly black hair, and memorizing the lines in his face when he smiled. For some reason he smiled a lot when talking about murder, it was probably nothing though. His head in my lap and his legs stretched out laying on his back and staring up at the sky, he looked so peaceful. His laugh was the best sound I had ever heard, although the one thing I couldn't stop staring at, were his lips. They were perfectly pink and plump, in the shape of Cupid's bow. The moved with such purpose when he talked and it was like they were begging me to kiss them. To kiss Sherlock, to feel those amazing lips on mine, to hold him, to tug on his hair and hear him moan with pleasure, oh bloody hell! I was getting hard! This could not happen, not with his head right there! Grandma, Grandma, Grandma! Sherlock's head shot up and he turned to look at me. SHIT! "John?" "Sherlock, I am so sor..." I was cut off "Do you know what time it is?" "What?" "What time is it?" "Um it's 12:15." I said glancing at my watch, thank goodness he hadn't noticed! "Can I borrow your phone?" "What's wrong with yours?" "To far away." "It's in your pocket." "John." he said flatly holding out his hand. Reluctantly I handed him my phone and he began to dial someone. "Who are you calling?" "My girlfriend, I was supposed to call her at noon." "Oh." I said my heart plummeting in my chest at the reminder that he was in a relationship with a girl. "Hello sweetheart. Sorry I missed you." He must have gotten her voicemail. "I'm calling from my roommate, John's phone. That's why I'm late calling, my phone died." Liar, his phone had 93% battery less then an hour ago. "Anyway I will talk to you tonight, goodbye." He handed me my phone back and resumed his previous position with his head on my, thankfully now erection-free, lap. "So what's her name?" "Who?" "Your girlfriend?" "Oh her." He rolled his eyes. "Trouble in paradise?" I said hopefully. "No, just something else my parents decided. I mean she is fantastic! She's my best friend, and I've known her forever, it's just an odd relationship." "Oh really? Why is that?" I was beginning to perk up. "Well it's rather easy to deduce that she is head over heels in love with me and I just don't feel the same way." "Well why don't you break up with her?" "I can't hurt her, at least not directly. Besides my parents would be outraged!" "Well they have to learn that certain decisions are your own. What did they say about the job you made up?" "Nothing, I didn't tell them. They believe I'm still deciding between being a doctor or a politician." "Oh" I said awkwardly. Sherlock closed his eyes and put his hands under his chin. Knowing he would be like this for a while I laid down. Sherlock shifted slightly but remained with his head on my lap. I wonder how Sherlock's girlfriend would feel our current positions. "You never told me your girlfriend's name." Sherlock opened his eyes briefly and rolled them up to look at me. "Molly. Molly Hooper." He said before closing his eyes again. 

### Chapter Two: The Party

###  We had stayed in the clearing for another hour or so, until Sherlock declared he was bored, stood up and marched off, leaving me to scramble after him. Eventually I ended up losing sight of him, so I decided to go back to the dorm. When I got to Baker Hall, there were flyers posted on every door for a party to kick off the school year at a student owned house in town. I thought that it might be a good way to get to know more people so I toke down a flyer and headed toward 221B. Sherlock wasn't there, so I decided to finish the reading I was supposed to have ready for the start of class. About two hours later, the dorm door opened and Sherlock strolled in, carrying, what looked like, miscellaneous junk. He plopped his objects on to his desk with little care, then strolled over to his bed. "What's this?" He asked, noticing the party flyer. "Oh it's a flyer for a," "I know what it is, why is it here?" He interrupted. I opened my mouth to answer him, but he butted in before I had the chance. "You don't expect me to go, do you?" "Not if you don't want to, I was just thinking it might be fun." "Oh," he groaned as he flung himself onto his bed. "Oh?" "Will its just if you go, I'll be here by myself all night." "What's the matter with that?" "What if I get bored?" "You can play with all your junk, you just lugged in." I laughed. "It's not junk it's an experiment! And what if I get bored of that?" "I don't know! Watch Telly?" "All of the shows are stupid!" "Well I'm going to the party, so I guess you will just have to deal with it, Sherlock." "Sometimes when I'm bored, I shoot things." "What!?" He had my full attention now. "Not living things! Obviously, but things like walls." He was acting as if this was a perfectly normal past time. "Well I hope you don't have a gun on you, but I'm not taking any chances with my security deposit, so your coming with me to the party." "What? No I don't want to!" \--- Sherlock and I stood near one of the walls. Around us people were dancing, talking and drinking. There was pulsing music and black lights. The only thing about the party that wasn't fun, was us. Sherlock was absolutely miserable, he was completely out of his element. I wanted to go socialize but I didn't have the heart to leave him in the corner alone looking like a lost puppy. "Can we leave yet, John?" "We've hardly been here for an hour!" "Is that a no, then?" "Are you really that uncomfortable?" He replied by looking away. "I'll be right back," I said and his eyes grew in terror. "What!? You can't leave me alone!" "I'll be right back," I walked over to the table with the drinks and poured him some kind of fruity vodka mixture. I walked back over to him and handed him the cup. "Drink this, it's punch." Sherlock toke a sip and spit it out, "What kind of punch is that? It taste horrible!" "Sherlock, just drink it, doctor's orders." He rolled his eyes and mumbled "You're not a doctor yet." But he reluctantly downed the punch. About half an hour later Sherlock was on the dance floor and I was trying to find someone interesting to talk to. No one was as interesting as Sherlock, I was beginning to regret helping him loosen up. With no luck finding anyone capable of intelligent conversation, I walked out on the dance floor to join Sherlock. "Hello Jawn!" "Hey," "Ya know that punch you gave me was really good! I had six more cups!" "You what!?" "Why aren't you dancing? You should dance on the dance floor!" He grabbed my hands and flayed them around well I tried to continue talking. "Sherlock have you ever drank before?" "Of course Jawn! Don't be so stupid! If you don't consume liquid you dye! As a doctor you should know these things!" "No I mean alcohol, have you ever had alcohol before?" "Of course I have! I had a glass of champagne at my cousin's wedding." "That's all! Oh bloody hell!" "I'm gonna go get some more punch!" "No Sherlock, come on, your coming with me." I grabbed his hand and started walking towards the door. "Oh are we going to your office, doctor?" "No we are going back to the dorm. I have a feeling you're about to get sick." "Well if I'm sick I should go to the doctor's" He smirked. "Come on!" He pulled me away from the main door and down a hallway. He was much stronger then I expected him to be. "Sherlock where are we going?" "To your office," "Sherlock I don't have an office, I'm not a doctor yet. Let's just go home." He turned a corner and opened the door to a closet. He dragged me in behind him and closed the door. "Sherlock what are we doing?" "I have a doctor's appointment," suddenly Sherlock's lips were on my own. They were so soft but tasted like liquor, and then they were gone from my mouth and on my neck. Suckling and devouring it, I heard him mumble into me "I want you so badly," but his speech was just mumbled because he was in the midst of giving me a hickey. I was really shocked, considering I thought he was straight, but I gained some composure and pushed him off. "Sherlock your drunk!" "I am not! I haven't touched any alcohol!" "The punch Sherlock, the punch was made with vodka! I assumed you knew that!" "Oh so this was your plan all along, get me drunk and have your way with me?" "What! No! Of course!" "Well it should have been!" He laughed and started kissing me again. It was fierce and hungry. Our tongues battled for control, and he pushed me against the wall. "Sherlock," He pulled at my jumper. "You're wasted." His lips moved to my jaw and then down my neck. "You are not thinking straight," Sherlock stopped and looked at me. His lips came millimeters away from mine. "You are completely correct John. I'm not thinking straight at all, I hate thinking straight! My preferences are much more curvy." His lips thrashed into mine once again, and his hands snaked it's way to my belt loop. His thumb moved along my skin as he got closer to the button of my trousers. A small moan escaped my throat. He undid the top button and began to kiss downward again except this time he didn't stop at my neck. He planted teasing kiss down to the rim of my pants. I had to stop him, he was drunk and this wasn't right. Just as he was about to pull down my pants and I was about to stop him, he threw up all over me. \--- The next morning I woke up still somewhat smelling like vomit, even though I had taken several showers last night. Sherlock was still sleeping, so I went to the bathroom to take another shower and get ready for the day. Today was my last day before classes and I wanted to make sure I got everything in order before they started. I still had to figure out where some of my classrooms were and pick up some more things from the bookstore. I came back into the room and Sherlock was sitting up and holding the sides of his head. "Morning," "Can you please be quieter?" "Sorry," I said rolling my eyes. He must have seen that because he looked at me, as if he were trying to figure out why I was moody. "What's wrong with you?" "Deduce it," "Can't, my heads killing me. Why are you being so cranky, looks like you had a better night then I did." "Excuse me?" "You've got a hickey." "What? I didn't notice that?" "Well you do have one. So since you obviously had a good time last night, why are you acting so pissed off?" I looked at him puzzled, he seemed genuinely curious. "Sherlock what do you remember from last night?" "Nothing, after my third drink." "Are you serious!" I shouted, louder then I should have. "John? Why are you shouting? Are you mad at me?" "You honestly don't remember what you did last night?" "Oh god! I didn't scare of your date, did I?" "Actually you threw up on me. Twice." "Oh god I'm sorry John." He rubbed his temples and rolled over facing the wall. "This is your first hangover, isn't it?" I realized and calmed down. "No." "Oh really because last night you said you didn't drink," "I don't drink, that doesn't mean I haven't felt like shit before." "I'll get you an aspirin" "No!" I spun around, taken aback by his outburst. "No pills John. Please." "Ok fine, I was about to go get breakfast, I'll bring you back some coffee." Sherlock mumbled something into his pillow, so I decided that he was saying thank you. \--- There wasn't any coffee left by the time I finished my food, so I decided to just continue on with my day. After about three hours of making sure I knew how to get from class to class alright, I headed to the book store. I walked in and saw Greg, my original roommate, and decided to say hello. He was standing with someone I recognized but couldn't remember the name of. "Hey Greg!" I called. "Oh hey John! This is my new roommate Phil Anderson." "Nice to meet you Phil." "Please don't call me that, I prefer my surname." "Oh sorry, how have you been Greg?" "Can't complain! How's life with Sherlock?" Before I could answer Anderson cut in, "Oh so you're the freaks new roommate? Sorry about that but hey thanks for switching!" "Sherlock's not a freak, he's a genius!" I debated. "You are kidding, aren't you?" Anderson laughed. "No actually I'm not! Why do you think he's a freak? Just because he's a little different?" "A little different? Have you met him? There is nothing normal about Sherlock Holmes! I don't even know why he bothered coming to uni! The way he is, he won't ever make it in the real world!" Anderson spat the words with hatred. Lastrade just stood there looking around not knowing what to say. I glared at them both, before turning and leaving the store, completely forgetting what I went in for. \--- "Where have you been?" Sherlock asked accusingly as soon as I walked in the door. "What?" "You said you were going to bring me coffee and you never did!" "Oh sorry they were out." "I thought you were supposed to take care of me!?" "Sorry, what?" "You got me drunk, you help me get over the hangover!" "I did not get you drunk!" "You gave me the boozes!" " I handed you one drink, the others were all you." "Likely story, I don't drink!" "Well you didn't know that the punch was spiked!" Sherlock cracked up laughing "Of course I did! I'm not an idiot John." "Yes you are." I laughed as I sat down on Sherlock's bed. "Are you seriously still feeling ill?" "No" "Then get up" "No!" "Sherlock," "Get out." "What?" "Get out! I need to go to my mind palace!" "Your what?" "Get out!" "Hey! Stop it! Sherlock there is no need to kick me! I'm going!" I shut the door behind me, and heard Sherlock lock it. "Are you serious!?" I shouted through the door, "What the hell even is a mind palace?" \--- After about an hour of banishment from my own room, I decided to google what a mind palace was. After reading the Wikipedia article which was mostly just big filler words, I thought I had a basic understanding. Basically it was a memory technique that could be used to store memories and to recover them. Then it hit me. What if he was trying to remember more about last night. I hadn't mentioned him kissing me because I figured it was just a drunken mistake that would make things awkward between us. But what if he remembered and realized I lied about it? I jumped up and started banging on the door! "Sherlock! Sherlock!" "Shut up!" he replied from inside the room. "What exactly are you trying to remember, Sherlock?" I shouted back. There was silence after that until, the door jerked open to reveal a confused and angry Sherlock. "Why do you care?" I started to walk into the room but Sherlock blocked the doorway with his body. "Sherlock" I said warning him to move. "Answer my question!" "You answer mine first!" "John!" "Sherlock!" He pushed me back and slammed the door in my face. "You are so immature!" I yelled at the door. "Am not!" "Then open the bloody door!" "No!" "Damnit Sherlock,it is my dorm too!" "So!?" "So you can't lock me out!" "John, I can't have you making noise or thinking well I'm in my mind palace. So yes, actually I can lock you out." I felt my blood boiling. Who does he think he is? What a complete and total asshole! People were starting to look out of their doors to see what the commotion in the hallway was about. "I bloody hate you Sherlock!" I shouted at the door. I walked outside to cool off, before I could attract any more attention 

### Chapter Three: The Lab Partner

###  I returned to the dorm after a few hours of walking around campus and sulking. The door was unlocked and Sherlock was gone, which I was relived about. I sorted all of my supplies for my classes tomorrow and went to bed. I had a big day ahead of me and I didn't need to be up late fighting with my know-it-all roommate. When I woke up the next morning Sherlock still wasn't there and it didn't look like his bed had been used. I figured he was just being pissy and I would see him later tonight. I gathered my books and headed to my first class, Anatomy 101. I was one of the first people to arrive so I picked a seat in the middle of the lecture hall, close enough that I could see the professor but far enough that he couldn't really see me. I watched the other students file in, I didn't know most of them, although I think i remembered some from the party. Lastrade and Anderson walked in and took their seats, without noticing me. The class was about to start, almost every seat was filled, except one next to me and one in the front row. The last person to walk in was Sherlock. He scanned the available seats and sighed. I was staring at him and we made eye contact. But instead of coming to sit next to me he proceeded to a desk in the front row. What a prick! I would say his choice backfired considering he got called on four times but he got all the questions right! I couldn't even be pissed about it, because his intelligence was so damn sexy! My next class was Organic Chemistry. I figured Sherlock would have this class to, so I stood in the hallway outside of it and waited until he walked in to the room. Of course we was one of the last people again. When he sat down, I walked in and took the seat right next to him. He rolled his eyes and turned his back to me. I didn't care though I got a reaction out of him and that's all I wanted. Our teacher announced that we would have lab on days we did not have class. And our lab partners would be whomever we were sitting next to. "Well I guess we're lab partners." I said to Sherlock. He groaned and glared at me. I didn't have another class for a few hours and time to burn, so after class I waited outside the door so I could annoy Sherlock as he walked to his next class. Though he didn't come out right away, I watched everyone else flood out of the class but no Sherlock. I walked closer to the door and I heard the professor talking to someone. "I'm sorry Mr.Holmes but you can't switch partners, everyone is already taken an it wouldn't be fair to the other students." "Then I'll work alone I don't need a partner!" "I'm sorry but you are staying with Mr.Watson until the end of the semester." Sherlock stormed out of the room not even realizing I was standing nearby. I started after him "Sherlock!" He kept walking though he obviously heard me. "Oy! Sherlock!" I yelled again as I ran to catch up with him. I grabbed his arm to stop him. "Get off of me!" "Why are you requesting a new partner?" "Oh like you weren't going to do the same!" "Actually no I wasn't!" "Don't lie!" "I'm not lying!" People were staring at us as we shouted back and forth. I grabbed his hand and began to drag him. "What are you doing? Let go of me!" "We are not doing this here!" "John, don't make me hurt you!" "I would like to see you try." I chuckled at the thought of this twig hurting anyone. But Sherlock made no attempt to hurt me or escape, he just let me drag him until we were in our dorm and I dropped his hand. "What are you doing, John? I have class." "Why did you ask for a new partner?" "You know why!" "No actually I don't. Not everyone can deduce what a person is thinking my the color of their left sock!" "Don't be absurd! Obviously both socks would have to be taken into account for any deduction!" "That's not the point Sherlock." I sighed. "I don't want to be paired with someone who hates me." He showed absolutely no emotion on his face. "What are you talking about?" "Last night you said that you hated me!" "I was angry, you were being irrational!" "I have never been irrational in my entire life!" "Well maybe you just weren't called out on it!" "You are wrong, I am an extremely rational person." He was like a bloody machine, I wasn't sure if he actually had no emotion or if he was just a douchebag. Actually no, I was pretty sure he was just a douchebag. "Sherlock I do not hate you. In fact your my only friend on campus!" "Then why did you say it?" "I told you! I was pissed because you locked me out!" "No you weren't. You were completely fine with waiting in the hall until I wouldn't tell you what I was doing in my mind palace." "I was getting fed up with waiting!" "John you are a horrible lier." "I'll work on it!" There was a pause in the conversation and awkward silence filled the air. "John, what happened at the party?" My entire body froze, my palms began to sweat and I just stood there like an idiot. Was he asking because he knew and wanted to know if I would tell the truth or did he honestly not know? "John?" "You danced pretty much the whole night and I went of with some bloke." A sad look spread across Sherlock's face for a split second and then it returned to its usual emotionless state. "That's what I wanted to know." "Ok then" "So you don't hate me then?" "No Sherlock, I absolutely do not hate you." Most of the time. "Well then I have class." "I'll walk back with you." "That's not necessary." "I know." I smiled The rest of the time until Sherlock's next class was filled with comfortable silence as we walked. \--- Sherlock and I ended up having four classes together including our lab. Sherlock was even smarter then I had realized, he could solve the most complex problems in his head. He would just close his eyes move his hand around a bit and he would have everything figured out. Most of the time though he would still make me go do the lab on my own because "a second opinion is always valuable", but I think in reality he just wanted to make fun of me for not being as smart as he was. I didn't mind though, I poked fun right back. Sherlock had quickly become my best friend and we spent most of our time together. We had become accustomed to each other's mannerisms and quirks, and we accepted them (most of the time, occasionally he was just to much of an ass). About a month into school, I was working on some particular tough biology homework and was stuck on a question. "Sherlock have you done the biology homework yet?" "It's not due until Friday." He sighed "It's Thursday!" "Is it? I must have lost track." "Will you help me with one of these questions? I'm just not getting it." "No." "Why not?" "Better things to do." "You are laying on your bed!" There was no reply from the boy, so I continued trying to solve the problem. I was getting ready to give up when I heard... "Bored!" "Then come and help me!" "No, that's even more boring!" I turned in my chair to face him, "Then what do you suppose we do?" "Let's play a game!" "No. Last time we played a bored game I needed stitches." "You overreacted." "I overreacted! Sherlock! Cluedo does NOT use real weapons!" "That was never specified in the rule book." "The answer is no." I said and turned back to my school work. "John" I ignored him. "Joooohn" He is the whiniest adult I've ever meet, I thought and chuckled lightly to myself. "John! My boredom is not funny!" He yelled as a flying pillow struck my face. "How old are you? Five?" "Obviously I'm not five years old John, you really need to improve your observational skills." After about 30 seconds of silence I figured I was safe from his reign of annoyance. I was, as usual, wrong. "Jawn" His breath was hot on my ear. "What Sherlock?" I said trying to sound angry. "Let's play a game." "No." "But Jawn!" He sighed as he collapsed on me, throwing his arms around to my chest and resting his neck on my shoulder. His touch was warm and inviting. Our faces hadn't been this close since the night of the party. I could feel my heartbeat and I hoped that he couldn't. I looked into his eyes and everything seemed to fade out of existence. I had studied these eyes, I got lost in them for hours, and I knew what they looked like. But something was different about them...his pupils were...dilated. "Sherlock?" He replied with a muffled groan. "Why are your pupils dilated?" His eyebrows shot up and he retracted his body. "Why are yours dilated?" "You know perfectly well why mine are, you had me pegged within the first two minutes of knowing me. I want to know why yours are?" We were both standing now. "I don't know what you're talking about." "You most certainly do!" "No I haven't the faintest actually." A smirk spread across my face, "Sherlock Holmes, are you attracted to me?" He took a step back but I followed maintaining our close proximity. "Don't be absurd John, I'm straight." A let a small laugh slip out by mistake. His eyebrows furred "Why did you laugh at that?" "I didn't." I said moving my eyes as to not look at him. "You laughed when I said I was straight!" Another one slipped out, oh god! "You just did it again!" "Sherlock your imagining things!" "No I'm not! Why are you laughing?" "Sometimes I just laugh at things." I defended. "Yes you laugh at things when they are funny. What's so funny about me saying I'm straight?" "Nothing Sherlock. I'm sorry." He glared at me expecting more. "There is absolutely nothing funny about the fact that you think you're straight." I chuckled and walked back to my desk. "No John. Not think, I am straight." He defended. "Whatever you say Sherlock." He walked over and spun me in my chair so that I was facing him. "Why don't you believe me?" "I didn't say I didn't believe you." "You implied it!" "If you actually aren't gay, then why are you getting so defensive?" Sherlock stammered, for once he didn't have a quick comeback. Instead he just picked up my biology homework and asked me what problem I was stuck on. 

### Chapter Four: Fish and Chips

###  Ever since the day when I had laughed at Sherlock's comment about being straight, our relationship had shifted. We were still just friends, but we were much more friendly. Most of our conversation now were just us flirting back and forth, and when ever one of us could find an excuse to touch the other we did. Whether it was Sherlock touching my arm to let me now he was near or me 'accidentally' grazing his hand during a lab. We had become closer without even realizing it. One day, we were laying in our clearing, Sherlock's head resting on my shoulder, his large trench coat sprawled out under us. "So what was it like growing up in your house?" Sherlock wondered. "Shouldn't you already know that? You've pretty much deduced everything about me." "Yes, but those are all facts. I want to know how you felt." "Well my dad died when I was four, so I don't really remember all that much about him," I began. "My mum raised Harry and me, well working two jobs. So things were hard but we all got through it together. We were pretty much always together! We used to call Wednesday, 'Family Night', we all made sure we were home and ate dinner together and played board games. It was a lot of fun." "I thought you hated bored games!" Sherlock interrupted. "No I like board games, I just hate playing with you." I laughed and he glared at me out of the corner of his eye. "Anyway it was always a really great time. I knew that whatever happened in life I would always have my family and I would always have family night. Then Harry started drinking and partying, and soon she was never around, not even for family night. And then high school came, and I came out and it was pretty horrible. I was bullied constantly and life kind of sucked. Mum started working another job to try and pay for rehab for Harry and things just got stressful. That's why I was so excited for uni, no more family drama, no more bullies, just a fresh start." Sherlock remained silent and just nestled his head further into my chest, letting me know he was there for me. "What's your relationship like with your brother?" I asked, nudging Sherlock lightly. "What relationship?" Sherlock growled "My brother is a narcissistic ass, who abandoned me during one of the worst parts of my life." "What happened?" "Let's just say that when shit hit the fan, he couldn't be bothered to drive an hour and a half to check in. Couldn't even pick up the phone when I called!" "Well what about when you were younger? Did you get along then?" "Actually yes we did, spectacularly so! That's what made it so hard when he left. We used to be inseparable when we were children. I looked up to him so much, no matter what he was doing, I was following along trying to copy him. Everything was fine when I was little! I had Mycroft, my parents never yelled or hit and I had Redbeard." "Who's Redbeard?" I wondered aloud "He was my dog, an Irish Setter. He was my best friend and my only friend once Mycroft started school. He knew all my secrets, and all my hopes and dreams. He died of old age, a few years ago." "I'm sorry." "Don't be. Death is a natural part of life." "It doesn't mean it isn't hard." Sherlock smiled up at me, a light in his eyes, as if it were the first time since Redbeard, that someone had truly listened to him. After a few more hours of talking, I decided that I was hungry, so we got up and headed back. Sherlock didn't eat very often but he always kept me company while I did. I like to think of it as a sweet gesture, that he came with me to spend more time with me. In reality I think he just used it as an excuse to slide his meal card as he walked into the dinning hall, so his parents wouldn't know he wasn't eating regularly. As we walked out of the forest, Sherlock's coat got stuck on a log, he stumbled and fell back. Luckily I was right behind, so I was able to catch him. He hadn't tumbled far before I grabbed him, so he was at eye level with me. His head rested in my arm, not very far from my face. I looked into his eyes getting completely lost in the galaxy that they were. This was not uncommon for me to do, but I could have sworn Sherlock was staring back into mine. Both of our breath hitched as he stayed in my arms, and we gazed into each other's eyes. "I, um, ah Sherlock? Are you gonna stand up?" I sputtered out, stupidly calling us back to real life. "Yes, sorry" he said brushing off his coat as he started walking again. "Just be careful, you clumsy git!" I laughed. "Oh please John, I'm nothing if not graceful." He called out as he almost fell again. I laughed at his rare stupidity and the moment after he fell was forgotten. \--- "Just play hookie! It's one day!" "My parents would murder me." "Your at college your parents won't know." "Mycroft will know!" "Mycroft is a twat!" "Let's just go to class." "Then you won't get to see my surprise, since you want to go to class so badly." "I don't want to John, I need to!" "Live a little Sherlock!" "I don't like breaking the rules." "Don't worry I'll change that." I grabbed his hand and pulled him out the door. "John where are we going?!" ~A half hour later~ "Uncle Tod, this is my friend Sherlock. He wants to go into forensics." "Hi there Sherlock! Have you ever seen a dead body?" "Just the one in front of me at the moment." I had brought Sherlock to meet my uncle, who just so happened to work at a morgue. I thought Sherlock would find this interesting but I didn't predict that he would have fun. The second he saw the body on the table a smirk hit his lips. Tod gave us a tour and let us look at some more cadavers, and Sherlock was reacting like he was at Disney Land. It was an odd mixture of creepy and cute, but he was definitely happy that we skipped class. After we left the morgue we got fish and chips from a food truck near the university. Sherlock talked through the entire meal about the morgue and the bodies we saw. He was exceptionally excited about one that died of a gun shot wound to the head. Tod had told us all about the case and how they found the murderer. At dinner Sherlock recounted the story adding in his own little tidbits here and there, about things the police missed. He said that and I quote "For once the police were right, but the method they used to find the killer was absolute horse shit!" He noticed such small details that could make or break the case. His intelligence was so sexy. \--- We arrived back at our dorm later that night. And to my utter shock, Sherlock turned to me and said "That what brilliant! Completely spectacular! Thank you John!" I stared at him in disbelief "Did you just say thank you?" "Problem?" he furrowed his eyebrows and titled his head every so slightly. "You've just never said it that's all." "Why would I need to?" "Well most people say it to be polite." He tilted his head a little more "I'm polite." To this I burst out laughing, I actually had to sit down to keep from falling on the floor. "I am polite." Sherlock insisted "You are probably the rudest person I have ever met!" My friends face then switched back to its logical emotionless state, as he sighed and sat down on his bed. I chuckled and walked over to him. "Oh come on! You know I don't mean it negatively, that's just who you are." He just sighed again and turned his face away from me. I chuckled again at his pettiness, and sat down next to him on the bed. "I don't even process the rudeness of your deductions anymore." "They are not rude, they are fact. People just don't like facing the truth. So it's easier for them to call me a freak then just accept it." This statement tore into me, he never really reacted when someone called him a freak, but it did hurt him and I hated that. I set my hand on top of his "You are not a freak Sherlock, you are brilliant." He finally faced me, and our eyes locked. We stared at each other, not caring about was going on in the rest of the world, just feeling the others hand, and listening to the others hitched breath. I started to lean towards him without even noticing, and so did he. Our noses were practically touching, when Sherlock jumped up and exclaimed "I feel sort of funny. Do you feel funny? Maybe it was those fish and chips we ate? Should've known better than getting fish from a food truck." I looked up at him, seriously annoyed that he had ruined our little moment, but I shook away the thoughts and answered him, "Ya probably wasn't our best idea." "Perhaps we have food poisoning." "I'm pretty sure if we did we would be vom-" "Did you know that in extreme cases, food poisoning can cause hallucinations?" "Um no I didn't know that." I rolled my eyes and prepared for a long lecture in which I would learn every little fact about food poisoning. It wasn't uncommon for Sherlock to go on rants like this, I once had to listen to him describe over 200 different kinds of tobacco ash. "I'm fairly positive that we have that form of intense illness." Ok not a lecture, what was he playing at? "Wouldn't that be interesting? Nothing we would do would have consequences, because none of it would be real! What do you think John?" "What do I think about what?" "Do you think it would be fun to have a night without consequences?" "Are you trying to get me to do drugs?" I asked genuinely confused. Sherlock sighed obviously annoyed I wasn't understanding what he was saying. "Can you just agree that tonight we have food poisoning driven hallucinations and that nothing tonight is real?" I watched him, still very confused and without knowing what I was agreeing to "Yes fine, whatever!" I blurted out. Not even a second after I said that Sherlock lifted me up by my collar and moved his tongue between my lips. After a moment the shock wore off and I began to kiss back. It wasn't like the last time, it was still fierce and hungry but it wasn't sloppy. Instead it sent sparks of electricity down my spine. He pushed me up against the wall and lifted my jumper up over my head and off of me. I tugged on his soft, tangled curls and a small moan escaped him. I began to move one of my hands down his hot chest towards his jeans. I undid the top button and he rammed me hard into the wall, taking complete dominance of the kiss as he did so. In between kisses I heard Sherlock say "I wish I could control myself around you, but I have wanted to rip your clothes off since the moment I saw you." I smiled and laughed "I'd say you had pretty good control then if it took you this long." My one hand was pinned above my head on the wall but I snaked my free hand into his pants and around his hardened shaft. I moved my fingers rapidly up and down his erection as he began to thrust into me, pushing me harder against the wall as he did so. I slid my hand down and began to finger his seeping head as he continued to thrust harder and faster. I sucked at the nap of his neck and he arched his back, letting out a loud "John!" I felt my erection grow at the sound of Sherlock moaning my name and pushed him backwards until we stumbled, falling onto his bed. I pulled his pants off of him the rest of the way before he flipped me over and began frantically work of my belt, and trousers. When he saw my pants he paused for a moment. "You wear bright red briefs?" He questioned. "Only on special occasions." I decided. "That is so hot." He whispered before tugging them off of me. He starred down at me, he looked almost as if he was trying and failing to deduce me. Sherlock's face went blank, as if he forgot what we were in the middle of doing. "There are condoms under my bed." I stated quickly before he zoned out or worse, decided to play straight again. 

### Chapter Five: Ultimatum

###  I woke up the next morning and Sherlock was gone. I figured he went to take a shower or something, so I got up and got dressed, it was gonna be a long day. After all Sherlock was still in the closet, had a girlfriend and had sex with me last night. We really needed to talk. I wanted a relationship with Sherlock, to be able to call him my boyfriend, and I think he wanted that to, but if he wasn't ready, it would be okay, we would still be friends and I would help him become more comfortable with who he is. I sat down at my desk and read, it was raining outside and I could hear the drops hitting my window, it was absolutely peaceful. "Hello John." Sherlock had walked in and sat on his bed. I put my book down and turned to him. "Good morning Sherlock" He didn't reply, instead he began to take out papers, that looked like homework. "Sherlock?" "Yes John?" "I think we should talk." "About what?" He was still staring down at his papers. "Last night." "What about it?" "Well I know you probably don't have much experience with that, and your still facing your own struggle, so I think we should talk about what we are going to do next." He finally looked up his eyebrows furrowed "Don't have much experience with what, John?" "Well you know..." "No I don't know. What are you talking about?" "Having sex...with guys." His face froze "Excuse me?" "I'm not saying you seemed inexperienced while it was happening, you were actually quite good, I just-" "While what was happening?!" This confused me "When we were having sex...last night." "John I'm afraid you are very mistaken, don't you remember we were both in the infirmary last night with food poisoning." "What?" "From the fish from the food truck." Then it dawned on me. Our conversation before everything happened last night. "Can you just agree that tonight we have food poisoning driven hallucinations and that nothing tonight is real?" "Sherlock." "I'm flattered that in your delusional state you would think of me, but it wasn't real." "Sherlock Holmes." "I do hope you start feeling better soon." "You bloody git!" I screamed standing up. "You can't fuck someone and then just act like it never happened!" "John calm down." "You started it! You pushed me against the wall! You kissed me! You were on top! So you can not sit here now and act like nothing happened!" "John I am not acting like nothing happened . Nothing did happen! I would like to remind you that I'm heterosexual!" "Really? Are you? That's strange because I've never had a heterosexual man jump my bones twice!" His face drew back quickly as a look of confusion and worry spread across his face, but it was gone in an instant. "Twice?" His voice was small. "Oh yes Sherlock! Remember the party we went to at the start of the year? You dragged me into a bathroom and started making out with me! Looked as if you wanted to do what we did last night but then you puked everywhere!" "Why didn't you tell me this before?" "Because you wouldn't have believed me!" "Well you're right, I don't remember the night at all, that probably didn't even happen and your just adding to your delusions to make them more credible." I just stared at him, unable to believe what was happening. I was fuming with anger, though my voice came out small "You're right Sherlock, you must have been hallucinating last night, and every night of your entire life, if you actually think your straight." And with that I left to go to class. \--- My first class of the day was biology, Sherlock was in the class as well but luckily sat no where near me. The professor walled to the front of the room to began class, today we were covering bacteria and the difference between helpful and harmful bacteria. About half way through the session I got a brilliant idea and raised my hand. "Yes Mr.Watson?" "Food poisoning is caused by harmful bacteria in food correct?" "Yes it is." "Could food poisoning ever cause delusions professor?" "Yes it could but only a very serious case, the patient would most likely be hospitalized before delirium set in. Why do you ask?" "I just saw something in my reading about it and was curious. So no one could ever have delusions caused by food poisoning and then be completely fine the next day?" "Yes, that would be quite impossible. Now let's get back to the lesson please." I glanced over at Sherlock, we was glaring back at me, but the second we made eye contact he turned his attention back to the professor, as he drabbled on about the characteristics of one-celled organisms. \--- "What the hell was that?!" Sherlock screamed as he walked into our dorm, slamming the door behind him. "That was me, trying to get you, to stop being an asshole." I said calmly. His face went from angry to showing no emotion at all, and his voice did the same. "John, what happened last night was a fluke. I am not gay. I'm sorry that you feel however you are feeling but last night meant nothing. Can we please just agree that it never happened? Which, may I point out, you already agreed to do last night." "Sherlock," I said mimicking his tone, "I didn't know what I was agreeing to and I hate to brake it to you but you are, in fact, gay. Obviously last night wasn't your first time with a man. But if you are so afraid of being yourself then I will pretend it didn't happen." "Thank you John." He turned and plopped on his bed face down. The room held a heavy silence for several minutes. "What do you mean, obviously it wasn't my first time with a man?" He muttered through his pillow. "I mean...it...you...it was good." I turned red as the words stumbled out. Sherlock flipped over "So if we both had an enjoyable time, why can't we just keep having 'food poisoning', have a nice night, and then go back to normal in the morning!" "Because things don't work like that Sherlock! Some people have actual emotions and don't want to have sex with someone and then pretend like there isn't anything going on!" "John," "I'm not finished! I don't care if you come out to the general public or not, but for God sakes Sherlock at least admit it to yourself!" "I..." "Still talking! If you want a relationship with me I am fine with being discreet but you have to acknowledge that we are in a relationship! And that's it, your only two options, we can be friends or we can be a couple but I am no one's fuckbuddy! And don't just blurt out something snarky! Think about your answer and be 110% positive before your give it to me because you only have this one chance! I am sick of your shit Sherlock! So whatever you say now that is what I am sticking with! Ok, now I am done speaking." 

### Chapter Six: The Begining

###  It's been three days since I gave Sherlock the ultimatum, and it's been three days since we have talked. The bastard still hasn't given me an answer. I guess when I told him to take time to think about it, we took it to heart. So now I'm stuck waiting to see if I get to date the guy I really like or if I am forced to just be friends with the guy I've already made hot, passionate love with. At least now we have classes, the weekend was unbearable. It made me realize that Sherlock is my only friend on campus and when he isn't speaking, life is exceedingly boring. Now that I have things to do, life is a little less boring but much harder. Have you ever tried to complete a college chemistry lab while your lab partner refuses to communicate with you? It's bloody hard! But I can't complain to much, at least he is doing what I asked. It must be so funny in his head, I can't imagine what it is like in his mind palace. I think that's a good thing though, he may be brilliant but he is quite messed up, his brain must be a very scary place. I just want him to give me an answer so that I can talk to him again, in any form of relationship, I just miss talking to him. I'm worried about him too, it can't be healthy to spend that much time alone with your own thoughts. Although he did tell me at the beginning of the year, that he often goes days without speaking, this is just the first time I've actually witnessed it, usually I can't get him to shut up. \--- It has no been five days! Five bloody days! Five! He probably isn't even thinking about me anymore. He has probably trailed off on some spree thinking about the different ways you can kill someone with tobacco ash. He is oddly interested in tobacco ash, and murder.....but I'm sure it's nothing to worry about....he won't ever kill anyone...I hope he won't...I hope he hasn't already...Oh God, what if he is thinking about how to kill me!? \--- He is actually going to kill me, with boredom. I really need to find more friends. It has now come to the point I have done both mine and Sherlock's homework, written to my entire family and watched the entire first season of Doctor Who. I am literally going craz- "John" a deep voice interrupted my thoughts. "Sherlock! Your talking!" I nearly shouted as I spun to face him. "Why are you so shocked? I've know how to talk for years." He was honestly confused "Yes I know Sherlock" I laughed "But you haven't talked in days." "I often don't speak while I'm thinking." "So what's up?" "The sky?" He titled his head, obviously not familiar with the expression. "No I mean, what have you thought about?" "What you said...and other things." "And what did you come to?" "John, I am already in a relationship with Molly." "Oh" I sighed "And I am extremely unhappy in it, I love Molly but not the way she loves me. I never understood why, well I actually, I've always known why, but I've chosen to ignore it. Usually I'm very well behaved, and if I do...do...things...it is over quickly and I never see the person again. But with you, well I see you everyday and frankly that pisses me off!" "Excuse me?" I began to object. "Shut up John! You anger me because you are living a life I can't live. And being around you makes me want to be myself, and be with you. But I can't- I can't have my family knowing any of this. So if you will be discreet like you said, then I would like to be in a relationship with you, and I will recognize it as such." I didn't know what to say, I just sat there staring at him, praying that words would come out of my mouth. I was exuberant but I couldn't say it, so I just sat and stared. Sherlock's face dropped "John? I waited to long didn't I? You don't want me anymore. It ok I understand" I got up and walked over to him, he was staring at the ground like a sad, adorable puppy. Then finally I started to form words "Oh course I want you Sherlock" I put my hand on his cheek and moved his face up towards mine, so that I could kiss my new boyfriend. \--- Things went on pretty much as they were, except with more cuddling, and hand holding and kissing and a lot more sex. I thought Sherlock would be rather shy about it, but it turned out, in that aspect, he was just like every other boy our age. I certainly wasn't complaining though! However that was the only aspect of Sherlock that resembled anyone else on the planet. I already knew that he was brilliant and strange but it seemed as if almost everyday I discovered something about my new boyfriend. For instance, I was getting ready the same time he was one day, and I heard him singing in the shower. The fact that he was singing at all surprised me, the fact they he was singing in Russian surprised me even more. In contrast to adorable traits he also had really annoying ones; I dozed of one night while he was in his mind palace, and he lobbed a book at my head! Apparently I was snoring and he couldn't think with the noise. Even with everything I learn about him, the most amazing quality he has is his ability to deduce people. I have seen him do it a thousand times by now and it still amazes me. Unfortunately with his deductions came quite a superiority complex and a seemingly overwhelming urge to manipulate people. I thought that our relationship would be above all of his mind games, that he would stop deducing me once we were a couple or that he would stop attempting to bend my will by confusing me. Needless to say, I was wrong. One random Wednesday I was sitting at my desk doing homework, annoyed at Sherlock from a small fight we had had earlier in the day. It wasn't even a fight really, it was just Sherlock being himself and saying something rude and me becoming defensive. Nevertheless I was annoyed with my dormmate. Sherlock walked into the room coming from his math class and stopped three steps in. "You are kidding aren't you?" He sighed and rolled his eyes. "What?" I snapped "You can't be mad at me. I haven't even seen you today, so therefore I haven't done anything for you to be mad about." "I have seen you today Sherlock but I'm not mad." I decided. "Well obviously you are John. Your jaw is clenched, your pencil is drenched from sweaty palms, the marks on your paper are much deeper than your usual writing from added pressure, and the hem of your shirt is wrinkled from where you've been balling it in your fist." "I'm not mad." I said again. "Then why are the Tums out?" "Because I had a stomachache!" "Stomach pain can be caused by anger or stress." "Or bad chicken! Stop deducing me, arsehole!" "Irritability. I know you are angry, stop denying it." "It will pass as long as you shut up and leave me alone for the night." "So you are angry. Why did you deny it? What was the point? Please John I don't have time for your immature games. This will be much easier if you just admit I'm right instead of trying to fight me all the time. I have the superior intellect in the relationship, you need to accept that." "You are the biggest twat, Sherlock! Shut up and leave me alone you cocky bastard!" I shouted. "Hmm, yelling, another sign of anger." "I'm going to kill you." I glared "Alright. Go ahead." He said extending his arms in an inviting manner. This confused me, I was accepting a witty, demeaning response. "Go ahead kill me. If you are mad at me then I see no reason to go on." "Oh come off it!" I rolled my eyes at his mockery. "I mean it John. If you aren't in my life I see no reason to go on. My heart will be empty, my hand will be cold without yours, my eyes will be bored without you to gaze upon. If you aren't in the room to brighten it then I don't want to be in the room. If you aren't in my life then I don't want one, so go ahead kill me, before I have to suffer a day without you." I just looked at him and blinked. Who could be mad after that? I wasn't even mad, just annoyed. I stood up, walked over and grabbed his hand, intertwining our fingers. "I suppose I don't have to kill you. Maybe I was overreacting to the whole situation. I'm sorry I was angry." I reached up to kiss him, but as I did he began to laugh. "What is it like in your funny little brain? I just got you to apologize for something I caused by reciting some romantic slush. Really John you must improve you brain power if you ever want to stand a chance in an argument with me." Sherlock waked away and plopped on his bed still laughing. I stood there staring at where he was standing, angrier than ever, yet slightly impressed. \--- Sherlock and I were working on a lab together in chemistry. Well we weren't really working together, it was more Sherlock staring at me well I did the lab he had already completed. I had pestered him for a while to just give me the answers but he refused, and I was blundering through the lab like a moron. Although it was organic chemistry so I was lucky I understood anything at all. I walked across the lab to grab a beaker when I heard someone say to their lab partner "He's not even doing anything! He's just sitting their, starring into space like the freak he is!" I looked over at Sherlock to see what he was doing, to most people it would look as if he was just zoned out, but I could tell that he was in his mind palace. Unfortunately this means that the girl was in fact talking about Sherlock. Why did people keep calling him a freak? I truly didn't understand. I hadn't ever actually talked to the girl but I'm pretty sure her name was Sally. I turned to her, an annoyed expression on my face. "Sorry, uh what did you say?" "Oh, just commenting on the freak." She laughed. "Who are you referring to?" I asked even though I already knew the answer. "Ya know the freak, Sherlock." She gave me an odd look, as if this was common knowledge. "Why are you calling him that?" "Because that's what he is." Sally snapped "Have you ever even talked to him before?" "I don't need to talk to him, to know what he is, but unfortunately yes I have." "Well then you should know that he isn't a freak, he's a genius." "Oh really then how come he has no idea how to do the assignment and has you doing all the work for him?" "He's already finished the lab, actually." "Whatever he is a freak." "Well you're a bitch." I sneered. "Excuse me!" She barked, standing up. "Oh I'm sorry, I must not have been clear enough. You're a slimy jealous mouth-breathing bitch! Don't ever let me hear you talk about Sherlock like that again!" Sally stood there gaping, apparently short of comebacks, so I grabbed my beaker and went back to my table. I began working through the lab again, when I heard a faint "Thank you," come from Sherlock's direction. 

### Chapter Seven: The Challenge

###  "Sherlock I am not having sex in the woods." "But it's our place!" "It's not happening." Sherlock looked down for a moment the started to walk towards me, "I will do anything you want me to John, as long as we do it here." "That's not a great bargaining chip considering usually you just do anything I want anyway." "Either we stay here in a romantic, sentimental place, or no sex for a week!" I couldn't contain myself once he said that; I was actually doubled over, I was laughing so hard. "You would never last a week! You can barley last 12 hours!" "John, you are mistaken." "Sherlock, the only way you could last a week is of you were in a coma." "Fine! Since you think I'm incapable of keeping it my pants, we will just have to see who breaks first!" "What?" Suddenly I stopped laughing and Sherlock stomped off. This worried me, Sherlock had made it a competition and neither of us would ever dare to lose a competition. \--- I sat on my bed staring at the ceiling and Sherlock was I'm a chair thinking. So far it had been a day since the woods, and nothing had happened. I mean nothing! I thought we were good friends and could talk about anything, but I guess once our relationship was no longer platonic our connection became purely physical. He hasn't said more then two words all day, and that was just to ask for the beaker in chemistry lab. The silence wasn't even Sherlock's usually 'I'm thinking leave me alone' silence, it was awkward. "Sherlock?" "Yes John?" "How was your day?" "Fine" "That's good, so was mine." "John, why are we making small talk?" "I just felt like talking." "I'm not really in the mood to talk." "Oh. Well let's play a game then!" "What game?" Sherlock sighed "20 Questions" "That isn't a game, it's a conversation." "Question One! What's your favorite color?" He sighed again "Purple" "Good! Now you ask me a question!" "I under the concept of the game! Why did you want to play this?" "I'm bored. Question Two, what's your favorite food?" "I don't enjoy eating I only do it when absolutely necessary. If you are bored, then why don't we do what we normally do when one of us is bored?" "That can't be healthy Sherlock, you have to eat. And because you issued a challenge and it made me realize that that is all we ever do. What is your star sign?" "What is wrong with that being all we do?" "You have to answer my question before I answer yours." "The zodiac is stupid and holds no logical meaning, I've deleted it. Your turn!" "Because we used to talk all the time." "We still talk." "Pillow talk doesn't count. Does anyone besides me now that you're gay?" "Only the others I've slept with." "Others? How many others?" "It's not your turn John! Does your family know?" "Know that I like guys and girls? Yes they do." "What do you mean girls?" "What do you mean what do I mean?" "You said you like guys and girls! What do you mean?" "I mean I like guys and girls, I'm bi." "So I have to compete with both genders?" "At least I'm only in one relationship at the moment." "Oh don't bring Molly into this! Your question." "Did you have relationships with those guys or just one night stands?" "No relationships John. Are you jealous of Molly?" "What? Don't be ridiculous! Why would I be jealous of your long time girlfriend that everyone thinks your in love with?" "Is that a yes?" "I'm not jealous of Molly. I'm jealous of your relationship with her." "Why on earth would you be jealous of that? We are in a dead end relationship, with no real feelings and we hardly ever see each other!" "It would just be nice to be acknowledged as a couple." "John, I, I'm sor-" "It's ok I understand, it would just be nice for someone to know how we feel about each other." "And how is that? Exactly?" "You have skipped my turn several times! Ok um, what was the fight with your brother at the beginning of the year about?" "I don't want to play this anymore." "What? Sherlock! I just answered all your questions! Answer mine!" "The game is over John." \--- "BORED!" "Jesus Sherlock, quite down." "BOORED!" "I don't care." "BORED!" Sherlock yelled one final time through a book at the wall near John's head as he did so. "So what do you suppose we do than, lunatic?" I asked in response as I barely dodged the book. "We could play Cluedo!" "No." I said flatly. "Why not?" "Because it's not actually possible for the victim to have done it!" "It was the only not possible solution!" "It's not in the rules." "Screw your rules. What about Monopoly?" "No" I said again "Why not Monopoly?" "Because you're an arsehole when you play that game." "You talk about rules but then get mad when I follow them!" "You were being a jerk!" "The goal of the game is to bankrupt the other players. Why am I a jerk for doing that?" "It's how you did it Sherlock." "By using strategic strategies to outwit my opponents? That's what Monopoly is all about! And I'm sorry if you only had $13, the rent for my space was $1000. I was just playing the game." I groaned and rolled my eyes "No bored games!" "Well I'm bored!" Whined Sherlock. "We could go out?" "Out where?" "I don't know, um, how about Herley's?" "But it's karaoke night." "It might be fun to go watch." I suggested. "Or horribly boring and deafening." "Ok not Herley's." I decided "We could watch something, I suppose." "Doctor Who?" "God no." "What, why not?" I gawked at him. "Nothing on that show makes sense! It's completely illogical, and Doctor Who tries to pretend he is a genius when his IQ is clearly inferior to mine!" "The Doctor." I muttered "What?" "It's The Doctor, not Doctor Who." "But it's called Doctor Who." "The show is Doctor Who. The character is The Doctor." It felt nice to be able to correct Sherlock for once. "Whatever! I'm bored!" He said grabbing another book and chucking it at the wall as he did so. "I think there might be a hockey game tonight, we could go to that?" I suggested. "I don't enjoy sports." "Then let's just sit and talk, like normal people!" I said becoming frustrated with my boyfriend. Sherlock nodded in response and the room filled with deafening silence for about 7 minutes until "BORED!" and another book went flying. \--- I was growing exceedingly tired of the challenge, but under no circumstances would I be the one to cave in. So I needed to make Sherlock give up, but I need to be stealthy about it. It was a Tuesday so I knew Sherlock would be out late at the library. Usually when he came back to the dorm on Tuesday I was already asleep in bed. So I decided I would pretend to be asleep when he got home. Sherlock walked in about 30 minutes after I climbed into bed. I could feel his eyes on me, when he realized what was wrong with the current picture. "John, wake up." He said quietly I kept my eyes closed and moaned. "John!" He said much louder. I blinked open my eyes slowly "Ya babe?" "Wrong bed." "I missed your Egyptian cotton sheets." "I don't care, get back in your own bed." "Sherlock I'm comfy, just climb in with me." A loud sigh came from the boy as he changed into sweats and took of his shirt. I moved over and he snuggled in next to me, suddenly his eyes flew open! "You're naked in my bed!" "Why are you freaking out? It's not the first time." I said with a smirk as I inched closer to him. "If this is some kind of plot to make me lose the bet, it won't work!" "Sherlock I was just sleeping." I said before I kissed his chest. "No kiss plot kiss here kiss" "You are cheating." "I don't recall any rules being set." I said as I continued to plant small suckling kisses all over his chest and neck. "Well I think...I think...I...ahhh" He lost his train of thought as I began lightly sucking at his ear. Sherlock grabbed my shoulders and pulled me into a passionate kiss. Than quickly pushed away and jumped out of the bed. "Tease." I glared. "Hypocritical bastard!" he shouted as he got into the bed on the other side of the room. \--- "John" whispered a deep baritone as I was nudge in the side by a sharp elbow. "What?" I asked confused and worried about being caught talking in class. He slid a piece of paper over to me, it read: Dinner tonight? Away from campus- just us Yes or No (Circle One) I blushed at his middle-school-like note. 'Away from campus' that meant a date. Our first real date since we started dating. I grabbed my pencil and circled the first option before sliding it back across the desk to Sherlock. He smiled before grabbing the note and stuffing it in his pocket. Under the desk he found my hand and gave it a small squeeze, before returning to his normal note-taking. Sherlock hailed a cab and we rode in comfortable silence for about 30 minutes before arriving at a fancy-looking restaurant. "Reservation for Holmes." he said to the girl at the front, she smiled knowingly at us and showed us to our seats. "You made a reservation?" "Wanted to be sure we'd be seated without a wait." "You were pretty sure I'd say yes, than?" "Why wouldn't you say yes? Have I done something? Are you upset with-" "No Sherlock," I laughed "I was just poking fun." "Oh, so what do you think you're going to get?" "I don't know, are you eating?" "I may have a small something." "Good!" I grinned. "So fancy restaurant, reservation, you are actually going to eat, what's the occasion?" "No specific occasion." "This isn't some ploy to make me cave is it?" "I just thought it was about time we went on a real date." I smiled and we made conversation for the majority of dinner. "William Sherlock Scott Holmes...that's the whole of it." "So do people ever call you William?" "Of course not why would they?" "Because it's your first name." I laughed. "What's your whole name then?" "I'm not sure I want to tell you that Willy." "Do not call me that." "How about Will?" "No" "Billy?" "Why did I ever tell you my first name?" Sherlock groaned "I don't know. Rather stupid if you ask me." He looked quite offended for a second but relaxed, "I am stupid around you." He took me by surprise, I wasn't sure what to say. "I'm never tongue tied or nervous except when I'm with you. I always want to say the right thing, say something to make you laugh or smile. I just usually don't know how so I stay silent." he exhaled at the end of the sentence like it was something he was anxious about saying. Now I was tongue tied I wanted to say something, needed to say something but my mind went blank. Finally I spoke, "I get that way sometimes too, just did actually. But there is no reason for either of us to be nervous, at least not you. I like you exactly the way you are, you just being you makes me smile." That made Sherlock smile. It was a perfect smile, a dazzling, real smile that reached up to his eyes. "I've always been able to keep myself distant. Divorce myself from feelings. With you, I can't do it. I have a million different feelings all focused on you and I'm atrocious at deciphering them, I've never needed to be able to until now." Sherlock said, once again anxious. I knew that had to be difficult for him to say, if there was anything Sherlock Holmes hated it was admitting he didn't know hot to do something. And if there was one thing Sherlock Holmes was awful at it was expressing his emotions but he managed to do both for me. "I'll help you." I said grabbing his hand on top of the table. God it felt good to do that, to declare to everyone in the restaurant that he was mine and I was his and there was nothing they could do to separate us. I don't know if it was the oasters I had for dinner, Sherlock being so romantic or just the fact that it had been awhile, but I didn't care about the stupid bet anymore. The second the dorm door was closed, I pushed him down on my bed and pounced on him. He ripped my shirt open as I frantically worked to get his belt off. His lips crashed into mine in a ravenous kiss before he flipped me over so that he was on top. "Not tonight," I declared into his kisses and flipped us back over. I slid my pants off and Sherlock turned over, preparing for me, just as there was a loud knock on the door. I sighed and pulled my trousers back on. I began to stand up but Sherlock grabbed me and pulled me back down. "John, it's been two weeks! Leave it!" he whined kissing me and rubbing his hand over my erection through my jeans. With all my will power, I ignored him and stood up again. "John!" "It will only take a second." "Jawwnn," There was a second knock as I walked over. "They aren't going away Sherlock, just hold on." I opened the door to someone I had never seen before. "Hello, I'm looking for Sherlock Holmes." 

### Chapter Eight: The Girlfirend

###  I looked back at Sherlock and his eyes were bigger then his erection from our previous activities. I looked back to the girl at the door. She was short and petite with big brown eyes and auburn hair pulled back into a high ponytail. "You must be John!" She said with a smile, "Sherlock has told me so much about you! I'm-" "Molly Hooper," I interrupted, the door was only opened a crack so she couldn't see Sherlock rushing to get dressed again. "I've heard a lot about you as well." "Good things I hope. So is Sherlock here?" She was up on her tip toes trying to peer into the dorm. I closed the door a little more, but as I did so it was yanked open by a large hand. "Hello Molly" "Sherlock!" She jumped up and wrapped her arms around his neck. I walked past them to go put on a fresh shirt just realizing now that I wasn't wearing one. I looked back after, and Molly was still hugging Sherlock tight. I heard her whisper "Do you have a gun or are you just really happy to see me?" I held back a bitter laugh and sat at my desk, pretending to read. "What are you doing here? Why arn't you at uni?" "I had a long weekend and wanted to surprise you!" "I love the gesture but please call a head next time, John and I have plans tonight." He said coldly. I thought for a moment, we didn't have any plans tonight. "Well couldn't I just tag along?" The poor girl looked ready to cry, I couldn't take it. When people cry I melt, I always have. It has resulted in this horrible habit to try and make people feel better. I stood up and walked back towards the door. "Ya know what Sherlock, we can hang out whenever, go have a nice night with your girlfriend." Sherlock gave me a look but Molly didn't notice. "That is so sweet of you John! Thank you! But I couldn't just ruin your plans, let's all go! Why don't you bring your girlfriend?" Sherlock shot me another look out of the corner of my eye. "I'm currently unattached." "Oh I'm sorry to hear that, but maybe you will meet someone at the bar tonight." She was almost annoyingly chipper...in a sad sort of way. "No that's ok, you two have fun." "Thank you John." Sherlock looked back and forth between Molly and I like a lost puppy. "I'll see you later!" I nudged Sherlock out the door and closed it before he could tell me to come. I did not want to spend the evening with my boyfriend and his girlfriend. Why did she have to come now though? Couldn't she have waited an hour or a day or forever? She was like a thorn poking and popping mine and Sherlock's happy little bubble. \--- After an hour I started regretting sending them off together. After two hours I was starting to regret not going with them. After three hours I decided to stop thinking about Sherlock and do some homework. After four hours I was wondering where the hell they went and why they weren't back yet! Finally at midnight I heard Sherlock come in. I turned in my bed so he couldn't see me, I shouldn't have been mad, I told him to go out, but I couldn't help it. Whenever I was mad at Sherlock I usually cooled down when he got in bed with me to sleep...but he didn't. I listened for his violin, but heard nothing. I told myself he was probably just thinking and I went to sleep. The next morning when I woke up, Sherlock still wasn't next to me. This wasn't completely unusual sometimes he didn't sleep for days, but I rolled over to get up and I saw Molly and Sherlock all cuddled up in his bed. I could actually feel my blood boil! I should have realized that when Molly was here they would be sleeping together, of course that's what couples do, but I hated it! I got up, got dressed and left. A few minutes afterwards I got a text from Sherlock: Where did you go? -SH For a walk -JW Why? -SH Because I wanted to -JW You don't usually go on walks. -SH What are you talking about we go on walks all the time -JW Exactly. WE go on walks, not usually just you. -SH Well you were a bit preoccupied -JW No I wasn't. I was just laying in bed with Molly. -SH Oh. -SH That's why you "went for a walk". -SH Don't put it in quotes, I actually am walking. -JW Why would that upset you? -SH Well I wouldn't say the quotes upset me, they were just annoying. -JW No I mean why would me being in bed with Molly upset you? -SH For a genius you sure are bloody stupid! -JW Why? -SH I wasn't going to respond to him anymore. He could figure out on his own, and if he couldn't then we would have to seriously rethink the "genius" title. I continued on my walk and the whole time my phone was being blown up by my idiot boyfriend. John, just because I don't understand your logic (I use that word loosely), doesn't mean I'm stupid. -SH You're stupid. -SH Why are you upset? -SH Why aren't you answering me? -SH You told me that Molly didn't make you jealous. -SH John? -SH You are not stupid. -SH You are wonderful. -SH But stupid for getting upset for me sleeping in the same bed as my girlfriend. -SH My girlfriend who I wanted to send away but instead you literally pushed me towards. -SH My girlfriend who didn't have a place to stay last night and insisted on staying with us. -SH My girlfriend who would be very shocked if I slept with you last night. -SH My girlfriend who is very close to my family. -SH All of whom know other people. -SH And all these people believe me to be extremely heterosexual. -SH Cuddling with my boyfriend doesn't really go with heterosexuality. -SH John. -SH John. -SH I kept walking, reading and ignoring the texts as I did so. Without really knowing where I was going, I wandered into the clearing in the woods. Our spot. Oh why did I have to walk here! This was mine and Sherlock's special place where no one else came. I did not want to be mad at him and thinking about Molly well I was here. I had turned to leave when my phone started ringing. It was Sherlock. "Hello?" "John!" "Don't sound so surprised you did call my phone." "Why weren't you answering me texts?" "Because your texts were pissing me off." "Well that's stupid." "Bye Sherlock." "Wait!" "What?" "When are you coming back?" "Don't know." "Oh ok then." He sounded sad and hung up. I wish I could just go back and make him feel better but I couldn't bare to see him with Molly (who was probably still asleep) in bed. I decided to stay out until noon and then I would go back to the dorms and see if I no longer felt nauseous being around the two(I wasn't holding out hope). \--- Unfortunately it had started to downpour so I had to return to my dorm sooner then I would have liked. Before going in I checked to make sure the coast was clear, "Sherlock? Molly? It's John. Everybody decent?" I prayed they were. A small giggle came from the room "It's just me John come on in." I was surprised to see Molly sitting alone in the dorm, playing on her phone. "Ah where did Sherlock go?" "Oh Greg and Mycroft needed his help with something." "Greg is friends with Mycroft?" That didn't make any sense to me, from what I had seen of Mycroft, he wouldn't get along with Lastrade at all! "Not really but they do know each other." She smiled. "So do you know Lastrade from school as well?" "Oh yes I've been friends with Greg longer then Sherlock! That was the group Greg and I, Mary, Sally and Anderson." "Anderson and Sally? The same ones that continually call Sherlock a freak?" "Probably" Molly didn't make eye contact as she said this, "They never got along. Actually once I started dating Sherlock only Greg and Mary would still talk to me." "Well who did Sherlock hang out with?" Molly's face turned sour and she rolled her eyes "He wasn't in a great crowd. He was dating this girl Irene at the time. She and their friend Billy got him into some bad stuff." "What kind of stuff?" Molly opened her mouth to speak but then closed it and looked down again. "Maybe you should ask Sherlock instead. Actually no! Don't ask him!" She shot up and ran over to me grabbing my shoulders "Its all over now it dosent matter! Please don't ask about it! He will only get upset!" The girl looked as if she was about to cry again. She was quite sweet, we may have actually been able to be friends if we weren't dating the same person. "Don't worry Molly, I won't bring it up." "Thank you John!" She threw her arms around me and squeezed tight. After that she went on and on about her friend Mary. She says we could double date with her and Sherlock. She was so excited of the idea of Mary and I, I wouldn't be surprised if she had already picked out her bridesmaids dress. Finally I couldn't take anymore, I had to do something else, "Molly would you like to go out for a drink? I don't think Sherlock will be back in time to take you out." "I would love to John! Thank you!" I thought, my boyfriend's girlfriend trying to set me up was the worst thing that would happen today, but if only I knew what the night had in store for me. \--- In the taxi, Molly told me everything about her childhood. EVERYTHING! For instance she was spanked twice in her life, once for hitting her brother and once for playing with fire. Oh and she got her first period when she was 13 and her first kiss two years earlier. Once we got to the bar, she tried to hook me up with every women who walked by. "She's cute!" "Go flirt with her John!" "Hi have you met my friend John?" Then she started drinking. I thought this would make the night better but there are two things I wish I knew before I took her to get liquor... 1)Molly Hooper is a lightweight. 2)Molly Hooper is a sad drunk. After two drinks she was absolutely plastered! And then she started crying. "Molly! Molly what's wrong?" "I don't know!" "Well why are you crying?" "You are such a great friend! It's so nice to have someone I can talk to!" "Thank you Molly but that's a good thing! No reason to be crying." "But I mean anything John! I could tell you anything!" "Molly do you think maybe we should head back to the university?" "Sherlock won't touch me!" My eyes grew the size of my head! I didn't not want to have this discussion. "Can we talk about this in the dorm?" "He won't do anything with me! He wants to save himself for marriage!" I couldn't help myself, there was no stopping it! I burst into loud laughter and almost fell out of my chair! "It's not funny John! His family is very religious! I just wish we could do something, you know?" The tears were streaming down her face. "John, I bet you've never had a girlfriend that you didn't satisfy." "What!?" I was becoming very uncomfortable. "Emotionally and physically!" "Molly." "I just love him so much and I want to show him! And I want him to show me how much he loves me!" "Molly did you ever think maybe there is another reason why he won't sleep with you?" "Oh yes! John I'm so happy you said something! Because I wasn't going to if you didn't!" "Wait, Molly! You know?" "Of course! I know everything about him! But he swears he never used a dirty needle! And we are going to get married someday! So if I'm going to get HIV, I'm going to get it! I can't go my whole life without sex!" My jaw dropped and my eyes grew to the size of apples. "What are you talking about? What do you mean HIV?" "I need another drink!" "That is not a good idea!" The bartender handed her a shot and she had it down before I could do anything about it. "John I am horny all the time!" "There is more to a relationship then sex." I desperately wanted to leave, I needed to see Sherlock and talk about what I had just heard. And then Molly's lips crashed into mine. Her tongue was down my throat and her tears were running into my mouth. I pushed her back and she looked up with sad doe eyes "Don't tell Sherlock." Fortunately for me, she passed out soon after. I payed the check and lugged Molly into a taxi. Once we were all situated I noticed I had a text I hadn't read from an hour ago. Molly? -SH I rolled my eyes, annoyed. What about her? -JW His reply was almost immediate. Do you know where she is? -SH She's with me. -JW Oh good! I had worried she had gotten into some trouble! -SH She has. -JW What!? Is she ok? -SH She is passed out drunk on my lap but she is fine. -JW I'm ok too. Thanks for asking. -JW Obviously you're fine John, you're texting me! Don't be jealous. -SH Why is she drunk? -SH I took her out drinking. -JW John! She is a total lightweight! -SH I figured that out. -JW Just please bring her back to the dorm! -SH Yup already on the way. -JW Oh and Sherlock? We need to talk. -JW Why? -SH Are you angry with me? -SH John? -SH 

### Chapter Nine: The 'L' Word

###  "John! You're okay! I was worried you didn't answer my texts." "Will you help me get Molly in bed please?" "Oh! Yes of course." I gently laid Molly onto Sherlock's bed and tucked a pillow under her head. Sherlock covered her up with a blanket and waited for me to say something. I just stared at him, the anger, worry and sense of betrayal building up. I grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the dorm, out of the building and to the clearing. I paced back and forth as Sherlock waited patiently. Finally I burst, "You have HIV!?!" "What? No I don't." Sherlock said confused. "Have you been tested?" "Of course I have! I'm not an idiot!" "You swear?!" "John!" "Do you swear it!?" "Yes, I swear it." I sighed heavily. I was still going to get checked just to be safe but at least Sherlock was clean. But was clean the right word? "Are you still using?" "No John!" "Because I swear to God if you are-" "I am not!" "Why didn't you tell me about this?" "Because I didn't want you to react like this!" "Like what? Like this extremely appropriate reaction!" "Overreaction." He said rolling his eyes "Excuse me! I just found out from Molly that you are a drug addict! This is not an overreaction!" I shouted "Recovering addict thank you very much!" "You should have told me." "I apologize John." "So what did you use then? Molly said something about dirty needles!" "Do we have to discuss this now?" "Yes we bloody well do! And who is this Irene person, you apparently used to date?" "Oh," Sherlock rolled his eyes and sat on the ground "So that's what this is really about? You're jealous of an ex." "What? No I am not jealous! I am furious! Not only is there this whole part of your life that I know nothing of, but I may also have HIV!" "You do not have HIV, because I do not have HIV! I was careful with what I put in my body!" "Obviously not if you were using drugs in the first place! So what was it then? What did you use?" "It's not important John!" "Yes it bloody well is!" "No it's not and I'm not going to tell you." "Then we are done!" I shouted and Sherlock just stared at me dumbstruck. Tense silence filled the clearing for several minutes. "Morphine." He said finally. "Ok" I breathed sitting down next to him. "And opium." I turned to face him, "And cocaine." "Oh my God! Sherlock!" "It's all over now! I went to rehab and I'm clean." "Do you promise?" "Yes of course, I'm clean." "And you know if you are every close to any of this stuff again, I want you to come to me and talk to me. Okay?" "Okay." "And Irene?" "She was a lesbian, we were each other's beards." He chuckled. I moved closer to Sherlock and put my head on his shoulder. "Are you still mad?" "I am still very upset with you." "Oh," he sighed and I moved closer to him. Then suddenly I remembered the other horrible thing that happened tonight "And for icing on the cake, after Molly told me about your adventures, she kissed me." "What?" His voice dropped "She kissed you?" "Yes." He didn't say anything in response. He just looked around seemingly upset. "Sherlock?" "What John?!" He snapped, suddenly all of his affection towards me gone. I paused, before moving away from him. "Why do you always do that?" "Do what?" "Every time you start to feel something real you just somehow turn off your emotions or you get angry! You know it is ok to feel things Sherlock! It is ok to care!" Sherlock locked eyes with me and in the coldest, most detached tone I have ever heard a human use, he said "Caring is not an advantage," he stood up and walked to the other side of the clearing, keeping his back towards me. He had left me with chills down my spine, the machinery of what he said stung like cold air on bare skin. How could anyone think that it was bad to care for people. Surely he cared for someone. His parents, Mycroft, Molly...me? I knew he cared for me, you don't kiss someone you don't care about how Sherlock Holmes kisses me. But why was he upset about Molly kissing me. Who was he upset with Molly or with me? He had no reason to be upset with me, I didn't do anything. But if Sherlock truly didn't see Molly as anything more then a friend, why should he be upset with her? After what felt like an eternity of silence and Sherlock refusing to look at me, I got up and walked back to the dorm. \--- Molly left the next afternoon. She didn't really say goodbye to me just gave me a look. A look of desperation to not tell Sherlock what she did. I guess he didn't talk to her about it that morning, but he also hadn't talked to me since last night. I was alright with that though, I was still furious with him. I couldn't even fathom that he was a junkie! Not only was he too smart to get into that stuff but from what I know of his parents he would never have been able to sneak around and get high. But at least he was in recovery. I never really thought about how much I didn't know about Sherlock. Before we started dating we talked all the time, and when we weren't busy with other things we still did, just not nearly as often. When he walked back into the dorm after saying goodbye to Molly, I had just finished getting dressed. "Are you still mad at me?" He sighed as he plopped down on my bed. "I don't know." I replied truthfully. "How do you not know if your mad at someone." "Because Sherlock, sometimes people don't know everything!" I said, much louder than I had meant to. Sherlock just rolled over and faced the wall. "Oh no! You do not get to sulk! Not on my bed! Get up!" I shouted, and Sherlock remained where he was. "Sherlock get up!" I said kicking his foot. He still didn't move, just groaned in reply. "Why are you even upset? Why do you care if I'm mad at you? I thought caring was a disadvantage!" "It is John." Sherlock said without moving, "Caring is a weakness found on the losing side." He didn't sound as inhuman this time, there was actually a lot of emotions behind his words, but they still stung. "Well then get of my bed." I whispered "I don't like losing John. I don't like having weaknesses." He flipped over to face me. "Can you just get of my bed please?" I knew what was coming. Seeing Molly sent Sherlock back into his state of denial and he was going to break up with me. "I do what ever I can, in order to win. I don't allow sentiment into my life. I don't care about people." He said finally standing up. I was bracing me self for his next sentence. "But as much as I tried to fight it, I couldn't. I couldn't stop myself from caring about you, John." I looked at him confused, that wasn't what I was expecting. He took a few steps closer to me, "I couldn't stop myself from loving you." "What?" "I love you, John Watson." He said with a smile. I walked over and hugged him tight. "I love you to Sherlock Holmes." I whispered into his ear. After a moment he pulled back, "And if you ever kiss someone in a bar, who isn't me again, I'll have your head." I laughed and pulled him into a kiss. 

### Chapter Ten: The Day to Day

###  Things were going much better with Sherlock and I, after Molly left. He told me everything about his high school years, what he used to do and how he figured out he was gay. He told me how his using had gotten worse after his realization and how his family had sent him to a rehab facility when people started noticing. "They were okay with my injecting poisons into my body but the second it started to hurt the family's reputation off I went." When he came home he started dating Molly, and started doing whatever his parents told him to do. "When I was using I didn't care, as long as I got my fix nothing else mattered, but once I was clean there was nothing to make the beatings tolerable. So I obeyed my parents, went to the school they picked out with the major they picked out and dated a girl from another well-off family. Do what they want and you don't get hit. That's why Mycroft is so uptight, he was never allowed to have fun." "Sherlock I'm so sorry." "It's not your fault, don't be sorry, it's just life. And besides now that I'm at uni I have a lot more freedom. Only certain things they can still control." "Like your sexual orientation?" "What no! They don't force me to act straight they honestly believe I am! They can never know I'm gay!" "Never?" "Well not until I'm on my own in London and I don't see them anymore." "And what about Molly?" "Well she's my best friend I hate that she got messed up with this but that's who my parents picked so that's who I have to date until-" "Until you're on your own in London." "Not on my own, until I'm with you in London." I leaned in a pecked his check and we kept talking. \--- About a month before winter holiday Sherlock and I actually had a healthy relationship. We talked about everything with each other and we didn't have any secrets. And our sex life was fantastic, by this point we knew exactly what the other liked and how to give it to them. In our own little world we were perfect, of course we couldn't stay in our dorm forever. So we went out and did our own thing and no one knew we were a couple. "Sherlock?" I was laying upside down on his bed as he studied at his desk. "John?" "Finals are going to be over soon." "Im aware. Your point?" "Well after finals finish we are on winter holiday, for four weeks." "Yes that's what usually happens around Christmas." "Four weeks we won't be here. We will be at our own respective houses, away from each other." "Oh" Sherlock turned to face me. "Well maybe that will be good for us? Some time apart?" My eyebrows shot up and I rolled off the bed. "Time apart would be good for us?" I said as I walked over towards my dorm mate. "Perhaps?" I reached Sherlock's chair and bent down on my knees in front of him. I ran my hand up his clothed chest and into his curls. I grabbed his head, pulling it down until our lips met. I ran my tongue along his bottom lip and he opened his mouth allowing my tongue to venture further. I pulled on his curls causing a moan to escape his mouth into mine. Our tongues moved in time with each other as I ran my finger along the top hem of Sherlock's jeans. Undoing them and pulling them off as slowly as I could just to wind Sherlock up more. I moved my mouth away from Sherlock's and down his chest, planting small kisses as I went until I reached his boxers. I bit the top of his boxers and began to pull them down with my teeth, just as his erect cock came into sight, I stood up and walked back to the bed. "But if you want time apart, I guess I'll just start now" I laughed. "You bloody tease!" Sherlock yelled as he walked over to me. "Sorry babe, like you said, we need time apart." I smiled mischievously. Sherlock bent down and kissed me. "I was very wrong. I'm sorry we do not need time apart." "Well in that case let me finish what I started," I said right before I took him in my mouth. \--- I honestly hated trigonometry. It was the worst class I had for two reasons; it was terribly difficult and Sherlock didn't take it. We only had a few classes together but all of our other classes were the same just at different times. But Sherlock was taking Calculus instead, so I couldn't just copy his homework like I sometimes did with the other courses. He also wouldn't help me, he said it was a waste of time for him to use brain energy on a class he wasn't in. It was actually pretty annoying, he could waste hours sitting silently in a corner but not 10 minutes to help his boyfriend! I was sitting in the back of the class trying not to fall asleep at the mention of pi, when my phone buzzed in my pocket. John... -SH I rolled my eyes, what an important message, I'm sure it couldn't have possibly waited until class let out. What Sherlock? -JW Where are you? -SH I'm in class...where are you? -JW No you are not. -SH What are you talking about? I'm in trig right now. -JW You have trig on Tuesday and Thursday. -SH What's your point? -JW It's Wednesday. -SH Damn it! I looked at my phone, it was in fact Wednesday, which meant I was currently missing anatomy. Fuck! That also meant I sat through an hour of this boring class that I didn't need to! I gathered my stuff and snuck out the back door. Is there any point in my coming to Anatomy now? -JW No, we are about to wrap up. You can copy my notes later. -SH Why didn't you text me sooner? -JW I just noticed you weren't here. -SH What? Sherlock how did you not notice I was missing? We sit next to each other everyday! -JW I thought you were just being quite, it was quite peaceful actually. -SH I rolled my eyes, annoyed at his lack of common sense and basic manners. I put my phone away without responding and walked to the nearest dining hall. 

### Chapter Eleven: The Double Date

###  Each student had a specific time for their individual lab exam and Sherlock's was on the first day. This was one of the most important finals for both of us since we were science majors. So Sherlock was in his mind palace basically all week. So I was left to twiddle my thumbs and study as well. That's what I was doing well Sherlock was in his exam, until the door was slammed open by an angry Mycroft followed by a sobbing Molly. "What the hell!?" I exclaimed before jumping up and rushing to Molly. "What's wrong?" I said wrapping my arms around her, "Mycroft how did you get in here the door was locked?" "I have a master key to get into all the dorms. Where is Sherlock?" "You what? Um he's in his lab exam, why? What's going on?" Molly began to sob harder into my shoulder. I hated when people cried. Whenever it happened I had no choice but to comfort the person. "She called me on her way here. Apparently her and Sherlock had an argument about a week ago and he hasn't returned any of her messages since." "Molly, Molly, listen to me, he has been in his mind palace all week! He hasn't moved until today when he left to take the exam. He was ignoring everyone, not just you." I thought about that statement for a moment, the man we loved was kind of an asshole. "Really? He's been in his mind palace all week?" "Yes, all week, so you can stop crying." Mycroft looked around uncomfortably as Molly hugged me "Well it seems like you have this under control John. Goodbye." Mycroft left, shutting the door behind him. "What was your fight about?" "He's just been so distant lately! We hardly ever talk, only text and even then it's like he's somewhere else." She began to cry viciously again. "John, I think he's cheating on me!" My eyes grew to the size of my face. "What! No! Of course not! He would never! That's crazy!" Molly looked at me questionable through her tear soaked eyes. "I spend everyday with Sherlock if he was seeing someone else I would know, and I can tell you that he is definitely not seeing another... women." "Are you sure?" "Positive!" As Molly began to calm down so did I. Then the door opened, and a familiar baritone voice flowed into the room. "I dominated that test John and now I'm going to do the same-Molly! Hello!" "Sherlock!" Molly screamed in my ear as she jumped up and flung herself onto my boyfriend. Sherlock laughed nervously "Molly sweetheart what are you doing here?" "I came to make sure you still loved me and weren't having an affair!" "You what!?" Molly continued to hug Sherlock tight "Don't worry John he cleared everything up!" I stood awkwardly apart from the couple but I could see Sherlock's confused expression as Molly said this. "Darling why don't you go clean yourself up and I'll take you out to dinner and we can talk." "Ok" she said letting going of Sherlock and wiping off her residual mascara, before leaving for the bathroom down the hall. "What did you say?" Sherlock asked as soon as the door shut. "I just said you didn't have another women in your life." Sherlock chuckled "Well you didn't lie." He walked over closer to me "Thank you for taking care of her again." "Your welcome." He kissed be sweetly, but within seconds the kiss turned into a hungry make-out session. "I killed that exam!" He said into my lips, "We will have to celebrate." I pulled on his hair making him moan with pleasure. "Molly is right down the hall." Sherlock pulled back and shot me a smug look. "Way to kill the mood." \--- Molly came back into the room, with her makeup done and her hair fixed. "You boys aren't ready yet?" she said in shock at the sight of Sherlock in jeans and an undershirt and me laying on the floor throwing a football against the wall. "What do you mean boys, John isn't going." "Of course he is! Apparently you've been ignoring him all week as well so he needs some social time." Sherlock shot me a look as I caught the ball "John said I've been ignoring him all week?" "Yes he did! So get dressed both of you!" "Molly I'm really ok staying in." "But John I have a surprise for you!" I furrowed me eyebrows and sat up "What?" "Well remember I was telling you about my friend Mary? Well I was to emotional to drive myself up so she drove me! She's been hanging out with Greg well I got things sorted, but now we are all gonna go on a double date!" "What?!" Sherlock exclaimed. "I don't think that's a good idea Molly." "To bad she's already getting ready, so get up you two and get dressed. I'm going to go help her." Molly left and I began to stand up. "John what are you doing?" "Getting ready, like Molly said to." "You're not going. Sit back down." "But Mary-" "I don't care. I'm not going to watch you on a date with someone else." "It's not a date, just a friendly dinner." "That's not what Molly said." "Yes, Molly. That's right, your girlfriend." "But see I'm not attracted to Molly because I'm gay. You are bi and could very well be attracted to Mary." "I won't be. And since your girlfriend is making me go on the outing, any argument of yours is invalid." Sherlock glared at me as I started to get ready. \--- About an hour later Sherlock and I were ready in our dorm waiting for Molly and Mary to show up. I looked over at Sherlock, "I can't believe you wore that shirt." "What's wrong with my shirt? I like my purple shirt!" "So do I that's the problem. It's my favorite shirt on you." "Well I didn't know that." "Yes you did." "Yes I did. But something has to keep your attention on me, instead of Mary." "You will be the only person I see." "If there are multiple people in your eye sight I don't see how you could only see me." "Oh my god Sherlock! I was trying to be romantic. Really how do you call yourself a genius?" "Shut up!" "Make me." "Oh believe me I really want to but they should be here any second." "To bad for you, I'm wearing my red boxer briefs." Sherlock turned towards be eyes wide "And you yelled at me for my shirt!" "Well I can see your shirt!" "Well I can think about your boxers!" Just then Molly opened the door "Ready?" We went to an Italian restaurant right near campus. It was a small romantic place that a bunch of students went on dates at. We sat in a booth near the back, the girls on one side, Sherlock and I on the other. "So what's your major John?" Mary asked trying to get a conversation started. "Pre-Med. Yours?" "Nursing! What a great match!" "Actually it's really not. To become a doctor John will have to be in school far longer than you will need to be to become a nurse." Sherlock rattled off smugly. "Well I think it's great you two both want to go into medicine." Molly said sweetly trying to counterweight Sherlock's statement. "What made you want to go into nursing?" I said trying to get the conversation back on track. "My grandmother was a nurse." "Really? So was mine!" "You told me she ran a boarding house." "My other grandmother Sherlock." The boy rolled his eyes. "So how were you both able to drop everything and come up here during finals week?" "We just shuffled somethings around. Molly didn't want to wait two weeks to see Sherlock." "You mean four weeks?" I corrected. "No silly! There's only two weeks left in the semester." Molly said almost too sweetly. "Did Sherlock not tell you? He's coming to my house for the first two weeks of break and then we are going to his house for Christmas and New Year's." "No he didn't tell me that." Suddenly Molly's attitude changed and she glared at Sherlock. "Well it's not set in stone." He glared back. "Yes it is Sherlock." I said sternly. "We said we might switch weeks." "But then you won't be home for Christmas!" Mary cut in. "No you said we might switch weeks, and I told you my family won't be home those weeks. Why do you want to switch the dates so badly?" The conversation was quickly going to switch gears into an argument between Sherlock and I, which he must have sensed too. "Let's not have this fight again, not here." "Again? Do you two fight often?" Molly asked surprised. "Well they do live together. I fight with my dorm mate sometimes." Mary said trying to save the reminisce of the conversation. "Well that's different your roommate is a very difficult person to get along with." Molly laughed. "Have you met your boyfriend. He is very difficult." "Oh so you think I'm difficult, John?" "Shirt!" I coughed, kicking Sherlock under the table. Molly must have made out what I said though, "What's wrong with his shirt? It's my favorite!" "Of course it it!" I rolled my eyes, upset that she also noticed how great Sherlock looked in his purple shirt. "So John how do you like freshman year?" Mary burst desperately trying to ease the ever growing tension at the table. "For the most part I love it, but sometimes I get a little homesick." I replied "I know what you mean! Do you have any siblings?" "A sister." "Your so lucky Molly and I are both the only children in our families." "How are things with Myc?" Molly asked, attempting to rejoin the discussion. "Myc? Do you mean Mycroft?" I asked confused and a bit disgusted at her calling the elder Holmes brother 'Myc'. "Don't even mention him!" Sherlock groaned. "I thought things were going better!" Molly pressed "They've been fighting a lot lately." I pointed out. "About what?" "Nothing, I wouldn't even call it fighting." Sherlock negated. "Sherlock talk to me! I want to help!" Molly reached for her boyfriend's hand but to her surprise he pulled it away. "So John, Molly said you've been single since you got to uni, any specific reason?" Poor Mary was still holding out hope that this could be a normal dinner. "Just haven't found someone I could see a life with yet." I lied but Sherlock must not have realized that's what I was doing. He turned his head toward me looking angry "Oh really?" "That's so sweet, I think it's great that you're sentimental that's so hard to find in guys." Mary smiled. "Well I wouldn't say he is sentimental. Just not looking for a relationship, he has a lot of one night stands, comes home with lots of hickeys!" Sherlock said still glaring at me out of the corners of his eyes. "John I didn't expect that from you!" Molly burst. "I don't have one night stands! I came home from one party with one hickey!" I defended, kicking Sherlock under the table again. "Sentimental and likes to have fun you seem like the total package!" Mary laughed "I knew you guys would hit it of!" Molly smiled "Well you didn't mention how beautiful Mary was." I flirted, hoping Sherlock wouldn't get upset. My hope was misplaced. "Sherlock are you okay you seem upset." Molly asked reaching for his hand again and being rejected again. "Oh I'm fine, the food is just taking forever!" Sherlock sulked "You didn't order anything." Mary pointed out "Maybe we should get some drinks over here to lighten everyone up!" I suggested, mostly for my own comfort. "Let's do shots!" Molly shouted. "Molly!" My boyfriend scolded. "Don't be so uptight Sherlock!" She whispered "I'm not uptight, but you are a lightweight." "I am not a lightweight!" Molly exclaimed "Oh really? Remember what you did last time you went drinking with John?" Sherlock glared back. The girl blushed and looked down "I don't know what you're talking about." "Well I'm in! I can handle myself." Mary decided "I'm sure you can." I said winking. I realized that this was a mistake when Sherlock shouted "John has syphilis!" "What?!" The girls exclaimed in unison. "Sherlock! Are you kidding me?" I glared "Just trying to look out for you Mary." He smiled "Oh is that what your doing?" I raged "I need to go to the bathroom. Molly, come with me." Mary said practically dragging the other girl out of the booth. The girls went to the bathroom, probably to talk about the horrible date the were on, and not actually use the facilities. "So I have Syphilis now, good to know" "Obviously not John." "Obviously not Sherlock! Why the hell did you say that?" "Because she wanted to sleep with you! And you weren't helping the situation!" "I was flirting! It's what people do on dates!" "Oh is it? Do you know what else people do on dates? Sleep together!" I couldn't help but laugh "Do you seriously think that I was thinking about sleeping with her? Sherlock in case you have forgotten I'm in a loving committed relationship." I reached for his hand, to which he did not pull away. "Really? I thought I was difficult and you haven't found anyone you could share a life with?" "Well you are difficult but that's ok, and of course I can see a life with you! But what was I supposed to say to that question? Well actually I'm in a relationship with Sherlock, I just told Molly I was single so she wouldn't suspect that I have sex with her straight virgin boyfriend almost every night!" "Of course you couldn't say that! Don't be daft!" "Sarcasm! You should have just trusted that I love you and I was trying not to blow your cover, instead of making me seem like a man whore!" "Well you did make out with someone in a bathroom at a party." He defended, lacing his fingers through mine. "That was you! And why haven't you told Molly about our plans for winter holiday?" "Because I want to switch what house we are at for Christmas and New Year's!" "Sherlock my mother and Harry are going to Italy, they won't be home! I've told you this!" "But think how nice it would be to have the whole house to ourselves, and spend the holidays just the two of us!" "The whole point of this is so you can meet my family!" "Then we can just spend the whole break at your house. Problem solved!" "Is this about your father? Are you worried he will find out about us, because I promise we won't! And if he even tries to lay a finger on you well I'm there-" "It's not about that John!" "Then what is it about?" "I want to be able to kiss you at midnight! To thank you properly for my gifts! To spend time with you, and not do stupid family traditions!" "And I would love that! But you can't just ignore your family!" "Yes I can, come on John as long as we aren't there for Christmas Eve!" "What are you afraid of the decorations they hang up?" "I think you may be!" "Nothing scares me Sherlock, especially not Christmas Eve traditions!" I let go of his hand as Molly and Mary came out from the bathroom. The food came a few moments later and we ate our meals in silence, then saw the girls off on their way back to their colleges. \--- Sherlock thought I was asleep when he called his brother but I heard every word he said. "Mycroft we need to talk!" "Yes it is about that! I can't do it, it's not happening!" "I'm not ready maybe next year!" "I know they have a timeline! "Of course I know what will happen. Why you think I'm telling you and not them?" "Maybe I just won't come home!" "Maybe I could talk to dad? Maybe he will be okay if it happens another time?" "I know it's a tradition, maybe that's why we need a change! Christmas Eve is a stupid day anyway!" "Just talk to them please!" "I know you've already tried, just one more time please and then I will talk to them myself." "I'm aware that caring is not an advantage! But maybe-" "Well they raised us and we are the most rational people alive." I chuckled at this, a little to loudly. "Goodbye Brother." Sherlock set his phone down. "John are you awake?" He said crawling into bed next to me. "How much of that did you hear?" "Only the part about you being rational." "You sure?" "Ya I just woke up." "Well go back to sleep it's been a long day for both of us, and you have your lab exam tomorrow." I only wish I could have heard Mycroft's half of the conversation. 

### Chapter Twelve: The Freakout

###  I got up early to walk around and clear my head before my exam. I wasn't sure where Sherlock had gone off to but he wasn't there when I woke up. I didn't think to much into it, sometimes when he can't sleep he goes to the library for quite or to the music school to play his violin in one of the practice rooms. I was much more nervous for this exam then I had expected to be. I had always been good at science, and I did most of the lab work on my own anyway, it was just nerve-wreaking to not have Sherlock there to help if I got stuck, especially on such a big exam. I had been studying most of the week but I still wondered if it would be enough; a lot of people fall chemistry. Finally it was 9:45, and I headed over to the lab for my 10 am test. \--- The exam was a piece of cake, which only made me nervous. It was easy...was it too easy? I either aced it or total bombed it. But that was my last final, which made me rather giddy. I had finished my first semester at Uni and I felt very proud of myself. I had the rest of the week to relax and buy Christmas presents- Sherlock still had one exam left on Friday and I had to wait for him. What was I going to get Sherlock for Christmas? He doesn't enjoy many things and it has to be something that he can open in front of his parents without raising suspicion. I decided to think on it for a few days before heading out to the shops. I returned to the dorm, which Sherlock was still absent from. I wondered where he was- I would have thought he'd be at his desk studying for his upcoming exam. While my mind was on it I decided to make a list of everyone I needed to buy something for, Sherlock, Harry and my mum of course and I should probably pick something up for Mycroft and Molly since I would be with them on Christmas. Mary might be at the Holmes residence as well but I wasn't sure she would want to speak to me let alone exchange gifts after that awful double date. As I was pondering over whether or not I should get Mary a gift, Sherlock burst through the door looking rather flustered. He ran his hand through his hair as he paced back and forth furiously. "Sherlock? What's wrong?" I said standing. He continued his erratic behaviors as he began mumbling incoherently. I rushed to him and grabbed his shoulders "What's happened?" He pushed me away and continued pacing. "Sherlock, calm down. Tell my what's wrong." He stopped suddenly and whispered "I don't know what to do." "You don't know what to do about what?" "I don't know what to do!" This time his voice was much louder. "There is nothing I can do! It's impossible!" "What's going on?" I was trying to keep my voice calm though I was quite worried about Sherlock at the moment. "I don't know what to do! What can I do John? Tell me what to do!" he yelled. "I don't know the situation, tell me what's going on and then I will try to help." Sherlock stood still and stared at me for several moments. Finally he spoke "I suppose we could brake up." "What!" I shouted "Sherlock what is going on?" "No that won't solve anything." he said waving his hand in the air. He turned to face me and took my hands "We could get married. Do you want to marry me?" I stared wide eyed at him "What is happening?" He let go of my hands throwing his own in the air "No that's no good either!" Sherlock began to pace and mumble to himself again as I stood exceedingly confused, watching him. After another ten minutes of freak out Sherlock sat down and stared up at me. "John, you cannot come home with me over winter break. I'm sorry." "That's what this is about?" I exhaled, crouching down beside him. "I am sorry. I don't want you to have to spend the holidays alone, I don't want to not see you for weeks but it's the only way." "Okay." I said taking his hand. He looked up at me "You aren't mad?" "Sherlock, if this is causing you this much stress then I'll just stay at my house. I don't want to do anything to make you this upset." "Do you still want to come to my house the first two weeks of break? If not I understand." "No!" He gasped "Of course I want to go to your house with you." "Okay." I smiled. "Then we will go to my house together for the first two weeks of break and then you will go to your house and I will stay at mine." "You're not angry?" "No Sherlock." He rested his head in my shoulder and exhaled heavily. "I love you John." "I love you too." 

### Chapter Thirteen: The Watson Family

###  Exams were finally done and winter break had begun. Sherlock had calmed down a lot since his breakdown but I could still see that he was upset. I couldn't get him to tell me what was wrong though, whenever I would ask he would lie and say he was fine. I thought that maybe it was the stress of exams but the closer we got to break the more anxious he became. I supposed he was just worried about seeing his father but he would usually tell me that sort of thing. We decided to take the short 2 hour train ride to my house, instead of driving. Sherlock's whole body was tense and his leg wouldn't stop shaking, hoping to calm him I reached for his hand but he jerked away. "What are you doing?" he barked quietly "We are in a public place!" "No one on the train knows us, it's fine." I said slightly annoyed. "Are you going to tell your family that we are dating?" he asked abruptly. "I was planning to, are you okay with that?" "They won't tell anyone else?" "Not if I ask them not to." "Then yes, I'm fine with that." \--- My home was small and quaint. It was cute but certainly nothing to brag about. The outside was a covered in tan siding that needed to be power-washed and snow hung from the roof just waiting to fall on an unexpecting person as they left the house. The inside was much the same, little space eluded too much clutter, our things were nice but unmatched and unorganized. There were four bedrooms and a bathroom upstairs, one bathroom, a family room, and kitchen downstairs which always had lingering smell of apple cinnamon muffins, that often wafted through the whole house. As we walked up to my red front door it swung up to reveal my beaming mother, "John!" she yelled as she through her arms around me and squeezed as if she hadn't seen me in years, although it had only been about 3 and a half months (Sherlock and I decided to stay on campus for the short fall break). "Hi Mum." "I've missed you so much!" She took a step back, "and you must be Sherlock!" she exclaimed as she pulled him into a hug as well. "You've already told her about me?" Sherlock mouthed to me. I shook my head no, as I hadn't told my mother the true extent of mine and Sherlock's relationship. "I'm so excited to have you with us! Im just thrilled that my Johnny has made such a good friend." she said as she backed up letting us enter my childhood home. "Actually Mum, about that. Sherlock isn't just my dorm-mate." I paused as her eyebrow shot up questioning my statement. "Sherlock is my boyfriend." My mother looked at me and then at Sherlock, before leaning over to me and loudly whispering "Isn't he a bit tall?" Sherlock heard this and quickly mumbled out "It's the coat." My mother turned to look at him "Well if its the coat," she said mockingly "then welcome to our home Sherlock." She grabbed him and forced him into another hug. I knew Sherlock was not a big touchy feely person so I greatly appreciated him not trying to shrug her off. Sherlock told me later that while she was hugging him she whispered in his ear "If you ever hurt my Johnny, I will destroy you." I had to laugh at this, because Sherlock was actually a tad scared by a short, plump women who slightly resembled Molly Weasley. Shortly after we had taken off our coats, Harry walked into our entrance way/ living room. "I thought I heard my little brother." She gave me a hug( she smelled slightly like liquor but I'm sure it's nothing to worry about). She glanced up at Sherlock and frowned "Who are you?" "Sherlock Holmes. You must be Harriet." he said. I was surprised he wasn't deducing my family, but he was probably just nervous, Sherlock wasn't great with making good first impressions. "It's Harry," she corrected "Why are you here Sherlock? " "I'm, well, you see- I am dating your brother." he said with a large sigh. This was the first time that he had ever told anyone that we were a couple. I couldn't help myself, I was grinning ear to ear. "Huh" Harry said before turning and walking away. The moment she was gone I grabbed Sherlock and pulled him into a kiss. "How did that feel?" I asked. Sherlock blushed "Well you're an fantastic kisser, so as with most of our kisses I-" I cut him off laughing "How did it feel to tell someone that you were dating a guy, that you were dating me?" He paused before giving a small smirk "Extraordinary". It was fairly late by the time we had gotten there, so we ate and went to bed. Unfortunately my mother insisted on Sherlock and I having separate rooms. I was lying in bed thinking about what a fantastic two weeks this would be with everyone I loved under one roof when my door opened and closed quickly. I saw a tall, gangly silhouette walk across my room and felt a body climb into bed with me. I curled into Sherlock's warm embrace. "What are you doing in here?" I chuckled. "I couldn't sleep without you next to me." "Someone is feeling sentimental tonight." I laughed, enjoying it nonetheless. "Who?" for a genius sometimes he was bloody thick. "You, Sherlock." "Oh." he yawned "Well maybe sentiment is found on the winning side after all." \--- The sound of someone loudly clearing their throat made me stir awake. Sherlock was still asleep next to me, which was the reason for my mother's cross face in the doorway. "I said separate rooms John." "Sorry Mum." I said as I elbowed Sherlock to wake up. "Unless you're married, couples stay in separate rooms in my house." "We will be married someday, doesn't that count." mumbled a still mostly asleep Sherlock. My mothers eyes grew and a smile spread across her face "Are you engaged?" she mouthed to me. I shook my head no, but couldn't help smiling myself at Sherlock's comment. "Well then, separate rooms please." she said before turning and walking downstairs. Sherlock had drifted back to sleep and I nudged him awake again. He groaned and buried his head in a pillow. I pulled the pillow out from under him and his face slammed into the mattress, but he still tried to remain asleep. I laughed and kissed his cheek, he so rarely slept that I decided to leave him be. I walked down the stairs, and into the kitchen to find something to eat, but Harry was already there rummaging through the refrigerator. "Anything good?" "Not much. Wanna make pancakes?" "Sure" I shrugged. \--- "What are you doing?" said Sherlock, an hour later when he walked into what must have looked like a kitchen a toddler had been allowed to play in. Harry and I were both covered in batter along with the walls, and no food had actually been made yet. Somewhere along the line, my sister and I began more interested in flicking batter at each other then in actually cooking. "Having a food fight." Harry snickered as she flicked some batter at Sherlock's face. He wiped the batter off, and gave me a strange look, "Where is your mother?" "Once she learned that Harry and I were cooking, she went to the store to get something edible for breakfast." Sherlock's face twisted with more confusion "She wasn't mad?" "We just have to clean up after ourselves." I said as I grabbed a handful of batter and through it and Sherlock's chest. He looked down at himself with a horrified expression, I took this as an opportunity to get some batter in his hair. He looked up at me, and seemed like he was going to cry. "John." he said as he walked toward me. "Sherlock, don't be upset, its just a bit a fun." "You shouldn't have done that." he said as a smirk spread across his face, he grabbed some batter and pushed it into my face. It was on! There was a full on war going on between the three of us and by the time my mother got home, we were all collapsed on the floor, covered in batter and laughing hysterically. My mother took one look at us and rolled her eyes, "Clean up or none of you can have the pancakes that I brought home from the diner." After we cleaned the kitchen and all showered, we sat at the table together and ate breakfast as a family. \--- The next several days were pure bliss. Harry and Sherlock were getting along well and the three of us would play games and mess around during the day. The nights were mostly spent watching movies in the family room, the fireplace burning and Sherlock and I cuddled up on the couch. It was amazing being able to act like a couple in front of other people. Sherlock had even seemed to calm down about it and miraculously, Sherlock had slept at least 6 hours every night so far. On the fifth day we were there, my mother declared at the breakfast table that it was time to go get a Christmas tree. This was my favorite holday tradition. As long as I could remember we would go to the McPharlen's tree farm, go out in the woods find the perfect tree and bring it home. The McPharlen's were great people, when we were little they used to give us candy canes and hot cider, well our parents payed for the tree and loaded it onto the car. Cutting down the Christmas tree each year was one of my best memories of my dad, he would get Harry and I all excited and ask our opinion on every tree until we agreed on the perfect one. As a reminisced, Sherock piped up "What do you mean get a tree? Don't you just have one delivered?" My whole family put down our forks at stared at him. "You've never picked out a Christmas tree before?" gasped Harry. Sherlock looked around confused that this wasn't normal "No we just order one and its delivered, then the maids decorate it, in whatever pattern my mother has picked out that year." "You've never decorated a tree?" My mum said in horror. "You've got maids?" Harry and I asked at the same time. My mother smiled sadly before taking Sherlock's hand in her own "Don't you worry sweetheart this year you will have a proper tree. I'll tell you what after words will even make Christmas cookies!" "I suppose you had chefs to make those." Harry chuckled "Yes I did." Sherlock said bluntly I laughed "She was being sarcastic, love." After breakfast we all got dressed in our cold gear and headed off to find our tree. We arrived at McPharlen's and headed into to their forest to find our tree. "That ones nice." Said Harry "It has a chipmunk." Said Sherlock We walked on, "How about this one guys?" asked my mum. "Hmmm no, it will start smelling far before Christmas, it has a rare form of spurs-" Harry interrupted him "How the hell do you know what kind of spurs it has?" A grin spread across my boyfriend face as he prepared to go through all the different type of tree spurs and how you could identify them. "Sherlock, don't." "But John I-" "No" "She asked!" "She didn't mean to!" "You never let me have any fun." He pouted "People want to punch you in the face when you have fun. And trust me Harry wouldn't hold back." My mother and sister were staring at us suspiciously. I realized that they had been the only people Sherlock had met since we had been on break and he had no reson to deduce them since he already new most everything about them though me. However my family knew very little about Sherlock, and didn't know about his powers of observation. This occurred to Sherlock and I at percisly the same time. "When do we get to met the McParlen's? After we get the tree? Well then let's hurry up and pick a tree! Come on people!" My mum was a bit thrown by the sudden change in topic but preceded to look for a tree with anyway. I grabbed Sherlock and pulled him behind "You can't deduce the McPharlens!" "How do you know I was even thinking of doing that?" "Because they haven't seen your deductions yet and your a showoff." "Am not!" "They are nice sweet old people don't get us baned from one of my favorite childhood places!" "When have I ever gotten you banned from somewhere?" He scoffed I rolled my eyes and recited a list of restaurants we had gone on dates to and places in the school we were no longer allowed (one of which was the library, which made studying very hard). "Let's just pick out a tree and next time we are out you can deduce as many people as you want. Okay?" Sherlock glarred "You are not in charge of me, John." "Not technically." I laughed "However I can withhold sex," I yelled wickedly as I walked forward. After another 15 minutes we found a nice tree that didn't have anything wrong with it according to Sherlock. I cut it down and carried it back to the small shop. "Ah the Watsons!" Chirped Mrs.McPharlen "How are you all this year?" "We're good and how are you?" "I'm doing alright. And who is this lad?" "Sherlock Holmes." He said holding out his hand "I'm John's boyfriend." "Oh" her eyes grew wide "Well it's nice to meet you." We payed for the tree and left, back in the car Sherock turned to me and whispered "You know that's a front for the Irish mob, don't you?" I couldn't help but bursting into laughter and kissing him. The night was splendid! We decorated the tree and the rest of the house, baked cookies, and Sherlock even got to deduce that our pizza delivery man was a heroine addict with four girlfriends. The week had been perfect, the only downfall was that there was only a few days left before Sherlock went home and I wouldn't seem him again until school was back in session. I was worried about him going home and I knew that he was too. \--- "Maybe we could both just stay here for the whole of break." Sherlock said sleepily next to me. The fire was roaring in front of us, mum and Harry had gone to bed, and I was cuddled up to Sherlock with my head on his chest. "You can't avoid your family forever Sherlock." "They aren't my family. They don't care about me in the slightest. You are my family." I snuggled in closer to him, as he continued. "I can't spend my whole life trying to please people who will never be pleased. I've spent to much time fight for their love, when I've already lost it. I have to stand up for myself, I'm too smart to be pushed around any longer!" "What are you going to do?" I asked "I'm going to bring you home for Christmas." he smiled down at me. I shot up and stared at him in disbelief, "You're going to come out to them?" Sherlock chuckled to hide his pain "God no! But if I have someone I love and who loves me at my side maybe I will have a better chance at standing up to them." "I won't let them hurt you Sherlock." I said taking his hand. "I'm worried about you getting hurt." He sighed. "Don't worry about me, I'll be fine." "I hope so." He mumbled before leaning in to kiss me. 

### Chapter Fourteen: The Holmes Family

###  A few days later we said goodbye to my family as they left on their cruise and we left for Sherlock's childhood home. After about a three hour car ride, Sherlock instructed me to turn into a gated community. The guard waved us through, obviously recognizing the curly haired boy beside me. After a few more turns we pulled into the driveway of what appeared to be a miniature mansion. It was at least ten time bigger than my house, stone in the front with a manicured yard and giant garage. It was a beautiful house but there was something off, it seemed almost empty, there was no warm light coming from the inside, no movement, no love. "This is were you live?" I gasped in disbelief. "Cold isn't it?" Sherlock said flatly. "My house must have seemed like servant's quarters to you" I laughed "I loved your house." He smiled "Besides only a few of our servants are live in, I imagine most of them have lovely homes." "Where should I park?" "Oh I don't have the garage code anymore, so um just pull up there, someone will take care of it." "Why don't you know your own garage code?" "They changed it last spring after I locked myself in there....with the cars on." I took his hand and squeezed, he had told me about this before and I should have realized what he was talking about. He pulled back his hand and put it in his own lap "No more of that until we are back at school." "Right, sorry." I said quickly "Don't be sorry. I love you more than words can express John Watson." Before I could say anything back he hopped out of the car and slammed the door. I jumped out of the car to follow Sherlock as he trotted up to the front entranceway. He knocked loudly and just as I caught up to him the door was opened by tall, skeleton-like old man. "Hello Mr.Barrymore." Sherlock said flatly as he pushed past him into the house. "Mr.Holmes, welcome holme." he said laughing. I smiled and slide past him, to reach Sherlock. "Did he just make a pun out of your last name?" "He does it to all of us every time we return from literally anywhere." he rolled his eyes "We let it slide though because we feel bad for him." "Why is that?" "His last boss went crazy and made him go into the forest with him. Claimed there was some sort of hound, apparently there was since they were both attacked by a large dog." "Oh my goodness, is the other man okay?" I asked as I looked back at Barrymore over my shoulder. "I have no idea, don't really care." I smiled at his statement, I always felt special when I remembered that Sherlock cared about me and not a single other person in the world. I looked around the house as I walked through, following Sherlock god knows where. It was massive! Giant rooms with 30 foot ceilings at least twelve fireplaces, a long oak staircase and a Christmas tree that could put London's to shame. The inside was quite like the outside, gorgeous but sad and cold. Sherlock stopped in front of a door and knocked loudly. "What do you want?" A voice boomed in reply. "Father, I'm home. I brought a friend, which room shall I put him in?" "I don't care! Ask your mother!" Without another word Sherlock began walking again, this time stopping in front of an open door with a woman standing on a pedestal, in a ball gown. She was surrounded by three other women who appeared to be taking the dress in and shortening it. "Lose weight mother?" "Oh you noticed!" "Why are you altering a dress instead of purchasing a new one? You usually take an excuse to shop." "Yes well this color blue is so hard to find and I'm thinking it would be the perfect color for accents at the wedding and I want to be in theme." "I have a guest, which room should I put him in?" "A guest?" She said spinning her head around abruptly. "I thought you were leaving him at the school." "I decided not to." "Hello" I said with a smile. "He's rather small, almost hobbit like." She said to Sherlock as if I wasn't right there and didn't just greet her. "Exactly he doesn't take up much room, he shouldn't be a problem. Which room?" "The red room." With that Sherlock was off again. "Wedding?" "Oh, yes my uh, cousin just sent out 'save the date' cards." "Ah.....Hobbit like?" I said snidely. "Well you are small." "Bigger than you are." I muttered just loud enough so only he could here me. Sherlock stopped dead in his tracks. "No you're not!" "We both know I am." I said walking forward, even though I had no idea where I was going. "You are not!" He whispered angrily behind me. "We are the same size and you know it!" "There might be a person up ahead, maybe you should change the topic, dear." I whispers back. He glared at me for using a term of endearment but I still could see the corner of his mouth curl up the slightest bit. We continued walking up a back staircase and down the hall in silence. "This is you. I'm down the hall." "Okay, so unpack, then what?" "Dinner is at 5." "It's only 11, what do we do until then?" "Oh, well, I usually read in my room until Im forced to do something else." "Okay, I will unpack then I'll come down and read with you." "What book?" "I'll steal one of yours." "You just want to sit and read one of my books for six hours?" "If I get to sit next to you while I read, and you don't have shitty books than yes." "This is one of the reasons why I lo-" Sherlock caught himself mid-sentence, realizing what he had almost said. His eyes growing wide in panic. "It okay Sherlock, no one is around. For the rest of the time we are here, how about we have a code word to say instead of that?" He nodded, still scanning the area for eavesdroppers. "How about 'reasons'?" "Perfect." \--- After a day of reading and discreetly playing footsie with Sherlock in his room, we were called down for dinner. "Any topics I should stay away from?" "Me" he groaned. I laughed quietly at his disdain as we walked down to their dining room. Like all of the other wood in the house the table was a rich oak, set with crystal glasses and plates and cloth napkins. The room was completed by 3 people standing to the side ready to pour water or wine, or fetch our napkin if it fell. It was almost surreal to me, I felt as if I had left the real world and walked into the royal family's summer home. Shortly after Sherlock and I sat down, Mycroft and Mrs.Holmes strolled in together, chatting away like two old hens. However the chatter stopped almost immediately when they realized we were also in the room. Mycroft sat across from us and Mrs.Holmes at one of the ends of the table. It almost seemed like she was glaring at me, but I couldn't imagine why. After a few minutes of murderous silence, Mr.Holmes walked in and took his seat at the head of the table. The food was served, and everyone ate quietly until Mr.Holmes turned to me, puzzled. "Who are you?" "He is Sherlock's roommate at University." Mycroft answered for me. "Why are you here?" "His family went out of town for the holidays. Mother said it was fine if I bring him here." Sherlock answered for me. "What is your name?" "John Watson." I was able to get out before anyone else. "Watson, Watson, I don't think I've heard of that name. What do your parents do?" "My mum is a nurse and my dad died several years ago." "Sorry to hear that. What's your major?" "Pre-Med, Sir." "Ah you want to be a doctor, not bad. Are you think surgeon or general physician?" "I think I'll probably study to be a trauma surgeon, I want to go into the military." "Good Heavens! Why? It's so dangerous and it doesn't pay as well as other medical potions." Mrs.Holmes exclaimed. "Shush up Lydia! The boy wants to serve his country, nothing wrong with that." Mr. Holmes nodded at me and then the table went silent again. A few minutes later, "How is Molly, Sherlock? Is she excited for the Christmas Eve party?" Mr.Holmes asked. "Molly is fine, I imagine she is looking forward to the party." "And you dear? Are you excited?" His mother asked smiling. "Not in the slightest." "Mycroft said you were nervous, don't be. It will go off without a hitch." "Can we please change the subject?" Sherlock said his face in his hand. All I wanted to do was put my hand on his knee or kiss him to make him feel better, but instead I just had to sit still in my chair, eating my salmon and wondering what was going to happen on Christmas Eve that kept making my boyfriend so upset. "So John," boomed Mr.Holmes's voice, "Do you have a girlfriend?" "No, not currently." "Really? Any particular reason?" "At the moment their are many reasons why I don't have a girlfriend, but I would rather not get into them at the moment." I saw Sherlock smile out of the corner of my eye at my use of our code word. "I'll respect your privacy, but you should really start searching for a wife before all the good one are taken." the man laughed. "I don't really see the need to rush." I said half-heartedly, taking a sip of my drink. "Differences of upbringing I suppose. We expect Sherlock to be married within a year." I almost spit my drink across the table. \--- After dinner ended I went back to the red room and pulled out my phone. They expect you to be married within a year?!?! -JW No reply. To who exactly? Molly? -JW Yes, to Molly. -SH Bloody hell Sherlock. -JW Its not actually going happen, calm down. -SH Calm down? Calm down! Sorry I just heard that my boyfriend is going to be marrying someone else within the year! -JW That is not going to happen, calm down. -SH Is Molly expecting a proposal? -JW I don't know what she is expecting and I don't care. I love you. -SH I love you too. -JW Whatever happens while you are hear just remember that it is you who owns my heart. -SH 

### Chapter Fifteen: A Christmas Eve Surprise

###  Trigger Warning: Mention of Abuse Within the week before Christmas, I finished three books and Sherlock finished twelve. Thats how the days would go, we would read in Sherlock's bedroom, go to dinner and go to bed. A few days Molly came over, she would try to get me to hang out with her and Sherlock but seeing them together made me physically ill, so I stayed in my room and sulked instead. The day before Christmas Eve, the house was filled with caterers, decorators, and personal stylists getting the house and them family ready for the party the next night. There was a knock on Sherlock's door, right as I was about to find out the secret identity of the villain in my book. Without a response from either of us, in walked Mycroft and two men in suits. "Go away." said Sherlock without looking up from his novel. "You both need to pick suits for tomorrow." said Mycroft flatly "Both of us?" I asked "Why do I need some special suit." "You are staying with us, you are our guest, and tomorrow night you will be representing the Holmes family, you cannot wear a jumper." Mycroft said smugly glaring down at the green knit jumper I was currently in. With that he went to leave but remembered something and quickly turned back. "Sherlock, when you are done they want you in the downstairs study they need to iron out some details with you for tomorrow night." Still not looking up from his book, Sherlock rolled his eyes "Oh about that, I'm not doing it." "Oh not this again. We have already talked about this, brother dear." "Yes and I'm done talking about it. You didn't have to do it, why should I?" "I did do it actually, twice. I was turned down." "I'm sorry, what are we discussing?" I jumped in, confused and concerned. "We Holmes boys have a little tradition, you see wh-" Mycroft was cut off by a book being thrown at his head by his brother. "Get out!" "When you are done go down to the study, I am done being your messenger, you can talk about this with father, yourself." Mycroft scowled and left. "Sherlock what was he saying?" "Nothing, not important. Pick out a suit." "It sounded important...is this the same thing you two have been arguing about since the beginning of the school year?" "I said drop it, John." he said harshly before leaving the room. I knew he would want space but I needed to know what was going on if I was going to help him through it, so after I picked out my suit and had it fitted, I sat back down on his bed and continued reading. After about two hours, the bedroom door opened and in walked Sherlock, with his usual emotionless expression on his face. He glanced over and sighed "Get out." "What?" I asked wondering if I had heard him correctly. "Leave, John. Get out of my room." He didn't sound angry, he sounded defeated. "What's wrong?" I said getting up and shutting and locking the door. "You are supposed to shut the door after you are on the other side." Sherlock said this as if I was actually confused about what the phrase 'get out' meant. I walked over and grabbed his hands but he jerked away suddenly, twisting his torso harshly away from me and letting out a sharp cry of pain. "Are you okay?" I gasped, walking over to try and look at his side. "I am fine. I do not need your help." he replied but didn't do anything as I lifted his shirt to reveal bleeding cuts and freshly formed bruises. I gently raked my fingers over his injures, causing him to wince in pain. "We need to take you to the hospital." "No we don't, I'm fine!" he said trying to push me backwards. "Sherlock, you could have internal injuries, your ribs could be broken!" "No, they are just bruised. They don't hurt anywhere near what they did when they were broken." "Love, please let me take you somewhere." He shot daggers at me through his eyes. I sighed "The door is shut and locked, no one heard me say that or will even know I'm in here." His eyes relaxed, and focused again on his injuries, "I'm not going anywhere. Please just help me get cleaned up or leave my room." I sighed but nodded in agreement. I grabbed a washcloth from his bathroom and damped it with warm water. I walked back and began to clean his cuts. "Did your father do this to you?" I asked, with a sudden realization. "Yes" "I will kill him." I said dropping the washcloth, "I'll kill him!" I began walking toward the door but Sherlock grabbed my wrist and looked up at me with eyes pleading me to sit back down. "I won't let him treat you like this." I said my voices breaking. "Nothing you do will change anything here. It will only land you in jail for assault." "He should be in jail." I said pointing towards the door. "That will never happen. We have great lawyers." he smirked trying to lighten the mood. I sat back down and continued cleaning his wounds. "Thank you." Sherlock muttered. I replied by stretching up and placing a soft kiss on his lips. He didn't flinch or pull back, he just welcomed the warmth of our kiss. "I've missed this." he said once I pulled back. "Me too." I smiled and stroked his cheek. "So I suppose whatever is going on tomorrow night, you were unable to get out of." "That's correct." "And I suppose you still aren't going to tell me what exactly that is." "That's also correct." "You don't have to be afraid to tell me, Sherlock. You know you can tell me anything and I will never judge you, I will understand." "No you won't." He said with a sad smile "Try me!" I jested. Instead of telling me, he greeted my lips with another warm kiss. "You think you can distract me with that?" I laughed. "Yes as I matter of fact I do." He said glancing towards the door before kissing me again, like it was the last time he would ever be able to. Even if he could kiss me whenever he wanted in two more weeks, I wasn't complaining about the passion. \--- As I straightened my bow-tie and did my final checks in the mirror there was a knock on my door. "Who is it?" I called "Sherlock" said the deep voice on the other side as he walked in without waiting for me to answer. He closed the door behind him and then turned to face me, his eyes lit up "Well then." "How do I look?" I asked already knowing his answer. "I've never seen you in a suit before, you look fantastic." "So do you." He was dressed in a black double breasted suit with a dark green shirt underneath, which somehow brought out all of the colors in his eyes. "I could stare at those eyes for an eternity and never get bored." "Well I think you would eventually, but thank you nonetheless." I looked at him startled, I hadn't realized I had said that out loud. I sighed "It's one of the many reasons why I love you." "If I started to list why I love you we would be here forever, and unfortunately there is a party about to start downstairs." "Yes I suppose we should head down." "I suppose." Sherlock said with a sharp turn around to open the door. As we walked down the stairs I felt as if I was walking into a movie. The scene was breathtaking! There was holly and poinsettia garland draped gracefully over the railing and the mantle-place. Candles glittered in the windows as waiters rushed by in penguin suits with trays of different hors d'oeuvres. A string quartet was warming up in the far left corner of the living room and the giant Christmas tree was looming over all of it like a beacon of hope and happiness. Slowly the party became more lively as the quartet started playing Christmas carols and people began to flood in, in tuxes and evening gowns. "Everyone saying hello to each other, how wonderful." Sherlock grumbled beside me, as we stood under the shadow of the staircase so that he could avoid socialize with his parent's friends. "Is it like this every year?" "For as long as I can remember. And it's not just Christmas Eve, we have parties like this year round." I was unable to reply before Molly came out of no where and through her arms around us both. "Why are you two hiding over here? Come talk to people, make friends." "No, thank you." Sherlock and I said at the same time. "Well at some point you will have to come out and enjoy yourself! I'm expecting at least one dance with you Sherlock Holmes." she decided before spinning around and running back over to Mary, who was carefully avoiding me after our disastrous date. "I suppose you should go dance with your date." I mumbled. Sherlock let out a loud groan "I wish someone would get murdered, that would make this party so much more enjoyable." I laughed at his strange obsession with death as he pouted and walked over to Molly. After an hour or two of making small talk with strangers, sneaking champagne from the bar, and talking in short bursts with Sherlock before he was pulled back out on the dance floor to dance with someone who wasn't me, I was about to call it a night and head back up to my room. Right as I was about to turn and leave I heard a glass clicking and Sherlock voice boom over the party "Excuse me! Could I please have everyone's attention for a moment!" The whole place froze and looked at my strange dangly boyfriend who stood awkwardly waiting for attention. "Love is a very confusing thing. You can fight against it and rebel but eventually you have to give in to it. Once you do that the whole world opens up." Sherlock looked over at me through the crowd, my stomach was in knots, what was he doing? "There are so many reasons why you can fall in love with someone and when you find that person, with whom you can share anything with, the person who will never judge you, the person who will make you feel like maybe this life is worth living, you need to make it known." Was he going to come out to his family and confess his love to me in this grand gesture? I could hardly breath, until he ripped his gaze from me and focused it on Molly. "As I'm sure many of you know, it is a long standing tradition that Holmes men propose to there beloved on Christmas Eve, in front of all our friends and family. " My hand began to shake, as he took a small black box out of his pocket. Why wasn't he looking at me? Why was he still staring at her? "So with everything I just said in mind," he opened the box to reveal a gorgeous diamond ring, and got on one knee."Molly Hooper, would you do me the honor of being my wife." I heard Molly say yes through as mask of tears, and heard Sherlock as why she was crying- if he had done something wrong. I felt like I was going to vomit. My knees became weak and my vision began to blur. I began walking towards Sherlock but someone grabbed me and pulled me back. "Don't do or say anything John. It will only make things worse for the both of you." Mycroft said half sympathetic and half threatening. "Where-where did you come from?" I said through my shaky voice. "I made sure to stand by you during the proposal. I'm not a dumb man John, I know what's been going on with the two of you and I need to make sure you don't cause a scene." "I need to get out of here!" I said trying to pull my arm out of Mycroft's grasp. "I anticipated you would react this way. I had a maid pack you bags and they are waiting for you by the kitchen entrance along with a car that will take you to a hotel for the night." "I-I don't have," I could barley get any words out of my mouth. "I don't have cash." I finally bursts out. Mycroft looked down at me with sad eyes "It's covered John. I am sorry you had to be apart of the family's collateral." With that Mycroft released my arm and I ran towards the kitchen. I thought I heard someone call my name from behind me but I wasn't stopping until I was far, far away from Sherlock Holmes. 

### Chapter Seventeen: Consequences

###  Sherlock Point of View "Molly Hooper, would you do me the honor of being my wife." I said with as much compassion in my voice as I could muster. Molly started to cry. For a brief moments her tears brought me hope, maybe she didn't want this, maybe she would say no and I would be free to be with John. But then she answered "Yes, of course Sherlock! Yes!" "Yes? Then why are you crying? Did I do something wrong?" "No! It was perfect Sherlock! Just perfect!" I slide my maternal grandmother's ring onto her hand and then she had her lips on mine, kissing Molly was nothing like kissing John. I looked over in the direction of which John had previously been standing to make sure he was alright, but he was gone. I scanned the room until I saw him towards the back, speaking to Mycroft. "Darling, go show off your ring, I'll be back in a moment." I said nudging Molly into a crowd, were she was more than happy to flaunt her new jewelry. I scrambled through the crowd, trying to push past the people congratulating me, but by the time I made it to my brother, John was gone. "Good job Sherlock. I knew you could get though it." Mycroft said emotionlessly. "Where is John? You were talking to him!" "He was upset, he is going to a hotel for the night." "What? No, I have to explain this to him! I doubt he is to the car yet, I can catch up to him!" I sputtered. Mycroft grabbed my arm "You need to go be with your fiancée, Sherlock." "Don't call her that, it makes me want to vomit." I spat and yanked my arm away to go after John. I ran into the kitchen and caught a glimpse of his hair headed out the door. "John!" I called "JOHN!" John Point of View I was so thankful to the Holmes for putting the room on their card. It meant I could order a giant bottle of expensive liquor and wouldn't have to pay for it. In fact I think I charged and extra $400 in food and drink to their card. I don't know if it was because I was hungry, or spiteful or what. My phone had been blowing up with messages but I silenced it, I could deal with everything in the morning. I couldn't process any of my emotions tonight so instead I just cried and drank and ate chips until I fell asleep. I woke up the next morning and I didn't realize where I was for a few blissful moments, but then everything that happened last night came flooding back, along with an awful hangover. I sighed and grabbed my phone to check the time. Instead I saw: ~52 Missed Calls from Sherlock~ ~37 New Voicemails from Sherlock~ ~112 New Text Messages from Sherlock~ I didn't care what they said, I didn't want to hear his apologies and excuses. Nothing he could say would make a difference. He had shattered my heart and a phone call or text message wasn't going to fix it, unless it said 'John, it was all a prank, I'm so sorry you didn't find it funny, please come back so I can propose to you instead.' Of course he wasn't going to say that, or anything like it. I set my phone down and after about 60 seconds gave in and read the message. John, come back. -SH John I didn't do this to hurt you. -SH I didn't do this because I love Molly and want to marry her, I don't. -SH Obviously I don't! How could you think I did? -SH I love you, John. You know that! -SH Come back, so we can talk about this. -SH Or at least answer your bloody phone! -SH You know this wasn't my choice! -SH You saw what happened when I tried to tell my father I wouldn't go through with it. -SH It was just a proposal! I doesn't mean I actually have to marry her. -SH Will you answer your phone?! -SH Just so that I know you are okay. -SH I can't leave the party. I can't come after you. So answer me. -SH I understand you are upset! But we can talk this through, nothing has to change. -SH John! -SH John, I love you. I do not love Molly. -SH Just let me know you are alright. -SH Please -SH For Christ's sakes John Hamish Watson answer your damn phone, so we can talk! -SH I need to know you are safe, that you didn't do something stupid! -SH Mycroft never should have let you leave! -SH I need to know you didn't do what I would have done, if our roles were reversed. -SH They continued on like that. He never once actually said the words "I am sorry." Messages were still coming in, all the same as the last ones. With shaking hands I typed out a response. I didn't kill myself, don't worry. -JW John! Oh my goodness! Where are you? My brother wouldn't tell me! I love you! I love you so much! Molly is just something my family wants! I don't want any of this! None of this was my choice! You have to believe me! -SH Was it not your choice to totally blindside me? I imagine this is what yours and Mycroft's fights have been about all semester, was it not your choice to lie to me for months? -JW I didn't lie to you, I withheld information. -SH What about London? -JW What? -SH You said when we graduated we would have a flat together in London. Away from your family, just us. Free to be a couple and have a family. That wasn't withholding information, that was just a lie. -JW John, I'm not going to marry her. -SH More lies. -JW No I will stand up to my father! I won't marry her! I don't love her! -SH Sherlock, you are even lying to yourself. Open your eyes, you will never stand up to your family, you will never come out, you will marry Molly and have a miserable closeted life. I'll be fine. I'll find someone else, I'll move to the city by myself. I'll learn to stop loving you. I'm going to try and switch out of our dorm. Give Molly my best, tell her I'm sorry I wasn't there to celebrate last night. -JW I put down my phone and listened to it ring and ring, whist I cried and cried. 

### Chapter Nineteen: The Spring Semester

###  Sherlock had not stopped spamming my phone, since Christmas Eve. But seeing his messages didn't make me feel better or want to forgive him, it only made the pain worse. Eventually I blocked his phone number, I did not need a constant reminder of my heartbreak, the anxiety that occurred whenever I remember that my request to switch rooms had been denied, or the looks of pity from my family when I came downstairs with red cheeks and bloodshot eyes. The worst part of it all though, was that I couldn't help but wonder how Sherlock was doing. I was so angry and hurt, but I knew that he was upset as well and had no one he could go to with his feelings. When winter break concluded, I returned to campus with a pit in my stomach. I didn't know how I could face him, let alone share a small living space with him. My heart dinged even more when I unlocked the dormitory door and saw our beds that we had decided to push together. I wanted to scream and cry and punch the wall, but instead I gulped and pushed my bed back to my half of the room. I unpacked my small suitcase, and laid on my bed with my earphones in, waiting for him, waiting to see Sherlock. Waiting to make sure he was still engaged, or still closeted or still whatever the hell else Sherlock Holmes was. Once I knew for sure the situation hadn't changed, I would head to the library and stay there for as long as possible. But as I waited for my roommate, the door opened and in walked someone I hardly recognized. His eyes were sunken back, his cheekbones even more prevalent than before but covered in unkept subtle and facial hair. There were bruises on his forearms, the backside of his elbow and several other places, and he looked like he had dropped two pant sizes. The purple shirt that I had once love to see him wear, was now baggy and hanging lazily from him. I pulled out my earphones and gaped up at him, "Sherlock," I said almost silently. "Ah, John, you're still here? I figured since you wouldn't answer me, and then blocked my phone number, that you probably would have talked to someone about switching rooms as well." "How do you know I blocked your number?" "Well when my texts started getting returned I figured you either killed yourself and your phone was disconnected or you blocked me, but you are here, clearly not dead, so it must have been the latter of the two." he said as he starred into the corner of the room blankly. "Sorry to disappoint." I said bitterly. "Obviously I'm glad we arn't both dead. At least you still appear to be functioning as a human being." he set his bag down, closed the door and walked over to his desk chair. "I miss you." he said as his voice cracked. I sat up and stared at the back of his head, as he was facing away from me. "What do you mean we aren't BOTH dead?" "Look at me, John. Do I look like I should still be walking around and breathing. Honestly I don't know how I haven't overdosed yet. Probably because my mother keeps flushing my stash so that my father won't find it, again. He found it twice when I first relapsed, that wasn't fun. I was hopeful that I would be able to use in peace here, but considering I'm still living with you, I guess probably not." "Where is it?" He didn't answer. "Sherlock! Where is it?" He remained silent, so I walked over and threw his bag down, searching for whatever was doing this to him. "What are you doing? That is my property! Get out of there!" he yelled. But I had already found the case containing all of his paraphernalia, "For a genius, you are so thick! How could you let yourself start using again, how could you let it get this bad, what on Earth could have driven you here?" For the first time since he had walked in, he made eye-contact with me. He just sat and looked into my eyes. "I did not cause this Sherlock! I did not cause any of this!" I yelled, tears threatening to fall from my eyes. "It doesn't mean my heart doesn't ache every time I think of you." I heard the door slam shut, and bolted up in bed. I was confused as to why there was music playing, and then I realized I had fallen asleep with my earphones in. I rubbed my face, thank God that that had all been a dream. Then I remember the loud bang that had woken me from the nightmare. I looked up and there was Sherlock, exactly how I remembered him. "Last time I heard from you, you said you were moving out." "The university wouldn't let me, said they didn't have enough rooms available." "Oh. Well then, since we are still living together and because I still love you, I think we should talk." "Are you sober?" "Yes! Of course I am sober, John." "Are you still engaged to Molly." "Yes, but John you have to understa-" "I think that's all we really had to go over." "No, it's not, I need to explain." "I read your messages, listened to your voicemails, nothing you said or could say will make any difference." "Then how do I fix us?" "You know how." "You know I can't do that." "Then we stay broken." \--- We didn't speak to each other again for the rest of the semester, besides the occasional 'bless you' when one of us sneezed or asking if it was okay to adjust the room's thermostat. I had made it clear that there was only one thing he could do to win me back and he made it clear that he wasn't going to end the engagement. It was hell on Earth, living in the same room with the man who shattered my heart, hearing talk about wedding plans on the phone with Molly, not being able to have him hold me and tell me everything was going to be alright. The months went by so slowly, I focused on my studies and started going to the gym, it felt like running and lifting weight were the only things that made me forget about Sherlock for a little while. There was also the added bonus of seeing Sherlock's pupils dilate and pants tighten, when I walked into the dorm sweaty, with disheveled hair and tired. I know it was petty, but a part of me loved that I could still get to him. A few people from classes had started talking to me at one point or another but eventually they all gave up on trying to be my friend, because I was so unresponsive towards them. Even though I disparately wanted him out of my life, Sherlock Holmes still occupied my mind almost every waking moment. I knew he was having the same problem with me, at the suggestion of Mycroft, to help get him out of his funk he had started journaling. One day when he was gone and I was very low, I snuck a look at his last entry. 'When he looks in my direction, I get a glimmer of hope that he might smile or acknowledge me or maybe even speak to me. Then I notice his gaze has gone past me, looking at something over my shoulder and my heart sinks. I'm not sure how much longer I can go on like this, living with John, but without him at the same time, is one of the hardest things I have ever had to endure.' There were tears in my eyes as I read this, I even thought about forgiving him, but then I read on. 'Although the idea of marrying her makes me gag, Molly brings light into my day. She is also so excited to talk to me, it makes me feel better knowing that someone cares for me. I often wish I could love Molly the way she loves me, that would make life so much easier.' After that, I stopped snooping through his belongings and tried to care less about what he was thinking and feeling. Finally, it was the last day of the semester, I would be able to leave Sherlock in my past after today. I would probably see him occasionally in passing, as we went to the same school, but maybe since we would no longer be living with each other things would become easier and I would actually be able to move on. Sherlock and I were both packing, and there were suitcases and boxes throughout the room. I don't know if it was fate or what that caused us to be almost back to back when Sherlock fell backwards over a box, but something made it so that I was there to catch him. Sherlock was in my arms, our eyes level and I couldn't help but to think back to the day in the clearing, when his coat got stuck on a log and we ended up in the same position. That was before the proposal, before we were a couple, before he had even admitted to me that he was gay. But it was when I realized it was more than I physical attraction. It was when I realized this strange boy was my soulmate, and I think this time when he fell, he realized the same thing about me. He stood up and stared at me. "Thanks." "You're welcome." He began to walk back towards his packing but then turned to look at me, "John?" "Yes, Sherlock?" I asked, voice trembling. He strode over to me, and backed me into the wall. "I love you." he said before he put his hand on my neck and pulled me into a long, deep, kiss. It was what we had both been longing for, for so long. Just feeling his lips on mine as he kissed me softly, made everything in the world seem right again. In that moment, only Sherlock and I mattered. But then the moment was over and we pulled away from each other, tears soaking both our faces. "What was that? What are you doing, Sherlock?" "I'm calling off the engagement." 

### Chapter Twenty: The End

###  "John, I don't think you understand how difficult these last few months have been for me. Not only was I unable to talk to my best friend and love of my life, but I had to see that person hurting. Every time I looked into your eyes, I saw all of the pain you were feeling, and knowing that I am the one that caused that, made me hate myself, significantly more than I usually do. In fact once I met you, I stopped hating myself at all. You helped me to realize that I am worth something, that I am a half of a whole. I need my other half back John, I need you." "What are you talking about Sherlock?" I sighed "That was a great piece of poetry, but that's all it was. We both know that even if you go in with the best intentions the second you see your family, you will forget all about loving me and become their well-behaved, straight, engaged son." "Not this time! Not anymore! I am tired of pretending, let me prove that to you." \--- There I stood, back in the living room of the Homes family, making small talk and acting like I wasn't utterly miserable. I was at Sherlock and Molly's engagement party...I was never supposed to be but unfortunately, I was. I had driven to Sherlock's house last night, because a few days ago as we were leaving campus, he promised me that he would come out to his family and asked me to be there for support. When I got to the Holmes Mansion it was already dark out and Sherlock said that he would tell them in the morning, but the morning came and went, and right about the time I was beginning to think he wasn't going to go through with it, Mrs.Holmes told me how nice it was that I had drove up for the engagement party. I confronted Sherlock about why he had told me to come last night, and he said that he had completely forgotten about the trivial event and that he would tell Molly and his parents after the guests left. I doubted it would happen but something inside me still had hope, so I was staying until an hour after the party and if Sherlock was still engaged to Molly by then I planned on never seeing him again. When Molly saw me she darted over and gave me a big hug, "John!" she shouted, "I'm so happy you are here, Sherlock said you might not have been able to make it because of family stuff, I hope everything is okay now." Molly had seen another guest and raced over to say hello to them before I could even reply to her. But I was relived, the last thing I wanted to do was talk to Molly as I was simultaneously praying for her fiancee to leave her. However my relief was short lived as almost right after Molly left, I felt a large hand on my shoulder. "What do you want Mycroft?" I said flatly. "I'm just surprised you are still here is all." "And why is that?" "After he didn't say anything when you got here last night, I figured you would have left." "After who didn't say anything," I said meekly, he couldn't possibly now could he. Though he did get me a hotel room for Christmas Eve, he had known I was going to be upset. "John, please. I know about you and my brother, I have for months. I want you both to be happy, really I do," he looked grimly at me, "but I also want my brother to be alive and have full ability of all of his limbs." "Why do you all stay here with your father if it is as bad as you say?" "Simple, family." "But you must not want family like him." "Not family as in my father John, if I leave there would be no one to protect my mother or Sherlock. I stay for them." "But why don't you all leave together?" "Honestly, I do not know John." And with that the elder Holmes brother walked away looking thoughtful and a bit confused. I walked around the party for a bit picking at the food the waiters were carrying, observing the odd way in which rich people interact at parties. I was eavesdropping on a particular boring conversation between Mr.Holmes and another stockbroker, when I spotted Sherlock and Molly in a corner under the stairs. Sherlock had his hand on her check and pulled her into him for a hug. They spoke some more, and Molly looked as if she was begging him for something. I couldn't imagine what the conversation was about but if from the few conversations I had had with Molly, I figured it was probably something to do with sex. I don't blame her though, if I had been with the same person for three years, and was marrying them and they refused to do anything with me, I would be upset too. Then to my surprise Molly ran upstairs, Sherlock following quickly after and I prayed that I was very wrong about what they had been discussing. I wandered over to the bar, and found myself having a very interesting conversation with the bartender, it turns out that both our dads had been stationed at the same base. I couldn't believe what a small world it was, but it was awfully nice to have a chance to talk about my father. Mum and Harry always got quite sad when I was to bring him up, so eventually I just stopped. I had lost track of how long we had been talking, but I had almost finished my drink, so I figured it had been awhile. We were in the middle of discussing the atrocious hat on one of the old women at the party when a hush fell across the room and I heard a faint glass clanging across the room. "If I could please have everyone's attention." Sherlock projected. "I would like to start off by thanking you all for coming. This is a very important day for me and I feel that I should, most likely, be feeling happy that I can share it with all of you, so thanks, I guess." I laughed at Sherlock's utter lack of normal emotions but I seemed to be the only one in the room who found his abnormal sentence amusing. "Today is a celebration of love. Let's dissect that a bit, shall we? To celebrate is to observe a notable occasion with festivities. In this case a notable occasion being my engagement to Molly, and the festivities being in the form of an elegant party my mother organized." There were a few small claps around the room and I could see Mrs.Holmes blushing in a corner of the large room. "So then what is love? I used to believe that it was just a pleasing mixture of chemicals in one's brain, but then I met someone who showed me what love really is. It is when you can look into someone's eyes and know that you are never going to be alone again. When you can hold someone's hand and feel infinitely safe. When you can sit in silence next to someone for hours and feel perfectly happy. When seeing that someone in pain makes your soul feel like its dying. It is a friendship caught on fire, the joining on two hearts in a quiet understanding and acceptance of each others qualities and flaws." I looked around the room for Molly, figuring she was probably gushing with delight as I sat feeling nauseous, but I didn't see her anywhere. Then I heard what he said next and my knees went weak as I realized why I couldn't find Molly. "Love is when you are having the worst day but when you look at him all the pain goes away. When someone calls you a freak and he stands up for you. When he knows you so well that you go on a date to a morgue. When he is willing to sit through painfully awkward dinners with your parents or horrible double dates with your beard and her best friend because he knows that you are not ready to come out of the closet yet. When he forgives you when he has no good reason to, because you proposed in front of him but not to him. However today I am choosing to correct the wrong I made on Christmas Eve. I am choosing to make this a celebration of true love, not of an engagement my parents forced me into." Sherlock scanned the room until his eyes met mine, and he held his hand out, beaconing me to come and hold it. "John Hamish Watson, there are so many reasons why we may not work, and only one reason why we ever could." I walked towards the center of the room, with what felt like a million eyes watching me, until I reached Sherlock and took his hand in mine. "That reasoning being that I love you, more than anything in this world, more than I ever knew was possible. And I know you love me too." "How did you possibly deduce that?" I laughed as tears threatened to fall from my eyes. "I didn't need to deduce it, somethings you just know. Like how I know I want to move to London with you after Uni, and get a little flat, and be a detective, and spend the rest of my life by your side." "That is what you promised." "No, before I just said it. Now I promise." As Sherlock said this we pulled a gold ring from his pocket and slide it on my finger. "Marry me." "Of course!" I said in a barley audible voice as I threw my arms around his neck, and just enjoyed the amazing moment, that I never thought would actually happen. For a few second I almost forgot about the few hundred people starring at us, mouths hanging open. I had no idea what to say to all of them, but as usual Sherlock had something to say. "Why do you all look so confused? I'm not marrying Molly anymore. I'm gay and I'm marrying him. I figured that was all pretty self-explanatory." \--- The party guest cleared out pretty quickly after that, and Sherlock and I just stood with each other, loving the feeling of being close to each other once again. "Wait, what about Molly? Is she okay?" I asked suddenly remembering that this was not such a happy announcement for her. "She will be, I think. I took her upstairs before all of this and we had a pretty long talk about everything. She said that it actually explained a lot and she only slapped me once, so I'd say it went pretty well." "She let you off easy then. I'm going to do a lot more than just slap you, Sherlock Holmes." Mr.Holmes voice loomed behind us. "How dare you embarrass our family like that! In front of all our friends and family you declare that you're a fucking homo, no sir!" He raised his hand preparing to backhand Sherlock to the floor, but just as he was about to hit Sherlock's face, I hit his. I put all of my weight behind it and delivered a mean right hook to Mr.Holmes's jaw. He clutched his jaw and spit out blood onto the floor. "Really son? You're gonna let this fag fight your battles for you?" "Yes he is. Because unlike you, my father was a real man. He taught me how to hit a punching bag, instead of treating me like one. And by the way he was a really good teacher, and if you ever touch another hair on Sherlock's head, I'll show you everything he taught me." "Did he mention, his dad was in the army?" Mycroft said stepping next to me, adding another person between his little brother and his dad. "What the fuck do you think you are doing Mycroft?" "Something I should have done a very long time ago." In my peripheral vision, I could see Mrs.Holmes walk up to Sherlock and take his hand in hers. "You can leave now Dad." Sherlock decided. "This is my house!" bellowed Mr.Holmes "I'm sure the divorce court, will give it to me, along with half of the business, don't worry." Mrs.Holmes said definitively. "Don't come crying to me when your life turns to shit!"Mr.Holmes huffed angrily before storming out of the house, for good. Mrs. Holmes turned to her youngest son and pulled him into a warm embrace, "I guess I just needed someone else's bravery to inspire my own. I'm so sorry I let him hurt you for so long, Sherlock. Please forgive me." "Of course I forgive you, Mum." As Sherlock hugged his mum again, Mycroft turned to me and shook my hand, "Welcome to the family, John."


End file.
